Kyoukai Senjou no Horizon 7

Turns out GoingOn is the social platform for academic life. It provides a modern on-demand solution for building a private academic social network. A private social network.

So how is this related to today’s weekly dose of CAPITALISM?! It is, because guess what – HORIZON is a MODERN, on-demand SOLUTION for building a private, ACADEMIC SOCIAL network.

You have all these students just STUDENTING UP the place with their ACADEMICS, SOCIALIZING, and PRIVATIZING of PUBLIC corporations for added CAPITALIST incentives. I mean, ADULTS don’t FIGHT WARS, STUDENTS fight wars! That’s why K.P.A. Italia will WIN against Musashi, because K.P.A. Italia has more STUDENTS. So what the adults do is… anyone’s guess. By anyone, I mean ME and by me, I’m not mean. I’m actually rather nice if you talk to me, but since nobody talks to me I guess I’m not actually rather nice.

I always thought that religion would be SUPER COOL and play a BIG PART in everything, because, y’know, back then, every single war was a RELIGIOUS WAR. I expected it to be somewhat magical – perhaps with CELESTIAL PERSUASIVE ABILITIES. I did not expect that believers of the Shinto faith could suddenly SUMMON GODS from their bidding and do ANYTHING THEY FUCKING WANT, simply by OFFERING an… offering. I understand, anachronisms are necessary for a show like Horizon… but you just don’t make religion a PHYSICAL WEAPON. It was all mental, and, y’know, RELIGIOUS, right? I guess the show wouldn’t be as exciting if all it was was was was was people talking all day, but meh.

I did appreciate the amount of TALK TALK TALK TALKing that happened this episode, though – far too many anime ‘solve’ debates through FIGHT FIGHT FIGHT FIGHTs. Fighting really doesn’t further your point in an argument about, say, whether abortion is moral. I mean, you can’t just go ‘HUEHUHUEHUEHUE I KIILLED YOU THUUS ABORTIONN IS BADDD IT KILLLS BRO’, or ‘HAHAHAZNHAAHHAH YUUR DEAD SO YOURR ARGUMENTT IS INVAAALID AND ABBORTION IS COL LOOOOZRE’, because their arguments /aren’t/ invalid simply because you beat them in a fight.

However, it DOES further your point if the debate is related to FIGHT FIGHT FIGHT FIGHTing – for example, Naomasa (whose arm is SO SUPER KAKKOII DESU) asking whether Musashi was able to fight. When SHIROJIRO BERTONI (whose name is SO SUPER ITARIANO DESU and his nickname is ‘POKER FACE’ because his dad ABUSED HIM as a child by PUTTING A POKER INTO HIS FACE) smashed her into the ground, it proved that Musashi was indeed able to fight.

The way Musashi was able to fight was also SUPER MONEY DESU. I mean, super cool. Of all the ways you could possibly fight, I did not actually expect LITERALLY /BUYING/ power. Sigh, religions… But wait, can’t Shiro pay the guards, who then give their pay philanthropically to a war funding organization, which then gives Shiro the money to pay more guards? That would make infinite money…

“Quick, Mr. POPE PRESIDENT POPE PRESIDENT PREMIER MINISTER PRIME PRESIDENT POPE! Unleash our SUPER CATHOLIC WEAPONS which can turn WINE into DEER and HAM into CHEESE!”
“How’s that going to help?”
“We’ll turn ALL Musashi’s supplies of WINE into DEER and then they will have NOTHING to drink!!!”
*stupefied*

I only understood MITOTSUDAIRA’s point of view after THIRTY-SEVEN DAYS of INTENSE MEDITATION, MEDIATION, and MEDICINE. In case you haven’t understood:
1. There are knights.
2. The knights’ presence boosts the morale of the commoners.
3. Commoners with high morale will fight.
4. If the commoners fight, they will die.
5. The only way to protect the commoners is to not fight.
6. The only way to not fight is to lower the commoners’ morale.
7. The only way to lower the commoners’ morale is to eliminate the knights’ presence (disband the knights) or prestige (lose to a commoner, showing everyone that knights suck at battle).

This is REAL POLITICS. There’s no THIRD PATH to walk down that is suddenly CREATED by the main character. It’s a LOSE-LOSE situation, and people EXPECT you to get out of them. Mitotsudaira’s final decision was to NOT DO ANYTHING, to encourage the commoners to fight, and hope that they’ll win. HA HA HA HA FAT CHANCE JUST LIKE HER FAT FAT HAIR MAN THAT HAIR IT’S JUST PRETTY FAT ALRIGHT

The MUSIC is still Horizon’s SUPER STRONG POINT, having BOUNCY TECHNO music with DRUMBEATS and like PARTYING all around while people are talking about HORIZON DYING and SAD SHIT, because having TECHNO MUSIC while that happens is an EXCELLENT IDEA. The ED CHANGES are also GREAT because MAN I REALIZED, the people in the ED are SHINTO GODS. THEY REALLY HAVE NOTHING BETTER TO DO DO THEY

tl;dr: THE TYPESETTING THIS EPISODE, man these stupid JAPANESE ANNOUNCEMENTS, bumping us HONEST ENGLISH SUBTITLES out of the way, the BULLIES they are

P.S. How come only the students of CLASS 3-PLUM in MUSASHI ARIADUST ACADEMY are partaking in the VOTE OF NO CONFIDENCE? What about the OTHER STUDENTS?! :(

P.P.S. Why would they BROADCAST to the ENTIRE WORLD a meeting of the STUDENT COUNCIL?! I mean, I know ‘children are the future’ etc. etc. but CHILDREN ARE NOT THE PRESENT! You don’t let SEVENTEEN-YEAR-OLDS RUN THE WORLD! If that happened I’d be dead in three days and a half

P.P.P.S. This GALILEO guy can talk WITHOUT moving his mouth! Is he the SAME Galileo as the Galileo in PHI BRAIN?! They both have red on their head and they’re not very dead cause their beds look like sleds that were put in the shed

P.P.P.P.S. Who’s this CROWN PRINCE guy that’s living with MIRIAM POLKA?! I thought he was HONDA MASAZUMI since y’know, their voice actors and appearances and everythings are the same but the show says they’re NOT… SO WHO IS HE!? ?! !? ?! !?

P.P.P.P.P.S. So where did Naomasa find a GIANT WRENCH, let alone TWO OF THEM? Why does she add BOOBS on her MECHA? Why doesn’t she create a TANK that fires HEAT-SEEKING ROCKET LAUNCHER LAUNCHER GUNS from SEVEN-HUNDRED AND SIXTY TWO DIFFERENT HATCHES on its EVERY SIDE? Gosh, this engineering club

P.P.P.P.P.P.S. The art is SO MUCH CRISPER than last episo-oh, never mind, it’s all blocky and I should probably upgrade cccp shouldn’t I

P.P.P.P.P.P.P.S. Upgrade cccp to CAPITALIST MODE, CCCP IS NOW THE CAPITALIST COUNTRY OF COOL PEOPLE