dammit im mad
p.s. notice: 26th filler post, posted july 26th
Once upon a land, in a time far, far ago, some guy asked me, “What the fuck are you doing you fucking retard? This fucking blog fucking sucks fucking dicks! Why the fuck do you even care so much about your fucking shit-ass site you fucking retard? Nobody even reads your fucking blog. Who the fuck are you trying to write for anyways? Go drown in a fucking well off the coast of Fucking, Austria!”
I may be paraphrasing, but this did cause me to have a revelation. After all, what’s the point of publishing a post every day for the past two (soon to be three) years when a) nobody reads them b) I don’t have fun writing the posts c) see (psst that was a pun)? I mean, shit, the last six anime I watched were complete and trite tripe, and those six serious are seriesly the only anime I have watched for the past nine months.
That’s the state of this blog’s degeneration! I don’t even watch anime anymore!
So, something’s obviously wrong.
After waking up at 8am this morning only to realize the full impact of reality, I admit I was extremely hostile but instead of mass tweeting philosophy, I took a long walk in a nature preserve near my place. I sat next to a stream for a good hour thinking about everything. I came back at around 11 and after a few minutes to myself, I decided to write this post.
I write posts because it’s fun.
I write posts to entertain.
Enough of this episodic crap. I’m not going to continue writing this worthless drivel about my personal interpretations of Mouretsu Pirates’s geopolitical ramifications, nor about the inner conspiracy to create a clone of Madoka in Black Rock Shooter (replete with filled-in star symbol). I’m going to write bad Sword Art Online fapfics and NOBODY CAN STOP ME
I had a pretty weird dream last night. I’ve talked to my friends about it, and they don’t know what to make of it. Since this talk was over a chat client, and I don’t feel like typing it up again, I’m just going to copy/paste (with some editing for spelling errors and removing usernames and timestamps, and changing the format from chatlog to paragraph. Besides these edits, the words have been left unchanged.). So my dream starts like this:
I’m in my room. It’s night. I look out the window, and for some reason, my neighbourhood has been replaced by a forest. Deciduous trees, bare of leaves. I think there’s snow on the ground, so it must be winter; that explains the lack of leaves on the trees. I can pick out faint roads, so perhaps my neighbourhood isn’t completely gone. There are no lights, save the moon, which is full and bright. I hear a wolf howl. I can see shapes. Shapes in the trees. Moving.
Today, a friend of mine, observing my attraction to firearms, said it was a fetish. Is it?
I like guns. I like the way they look, the way that everything performs a specific function, the way everything fits together. I like how they sound, how the action sounds when it closes, the sound of the extractor pulling a casing out of the chamber, the sound of the ejector kicking the brass out of the ejection port-
Oh fuck. It is a fetish. Isn’t it.
They say the first step is admitting you have a problem. Okay. I have a problem. But what if I like that problem? Is there something wrong with me? I don’t think so. Well… here. Have a drawing of a Mauser C96. She’s old, but still sexier than most handguns can ever hope to be.
THE POST TITLE IS A PUN ON ‘SUMMER’
BECAUSE IT’S SUMMER
well on the 23rd it is but WHATEVER ALRIGHT, REWRITTEN FILLER POSTS ETC. ETC.
It’s a pun, alright! It’s the only thing I can do now that I’m sick. Or should I say, stick?
…No, wait, that doesn’t even make sense.
Anyways, remember the good ol’ days of YTV before I discovered good ol’ 4kids’s horrible dub of One Piece and back when everything sucked? Well, everything still sucks now, but at least anime wasn’t as entertaining as good ol’ bad YTV cartoons. Yes, everything sucks. But that’s to be expected when all you’ve done all day was (instead of doing any homework or even writing any posts besides this one) lie around in bed with your throat burning, your head on fire, and your eyes blinded from fatigue and exhaustion. And also from wearing glasses again after a year without. Thank God I’m not you, but I’m suffering from everything you’re suffering too: including this extreme inclination to suddenly write a bad post.
Yeah. Sorry for all these sick posts. Y’know, if CERTAIN PEOPLE responded to my request for them to BLOG FOR O-NEW, you would not have to suffer through this trite tripe! Instead, you would have to suffer through other trite tripe. Also: were you ever wondering about why you feel cold when you have a fever? Well, turns out that a fever is completely different from hyperthermia, and even more different from hypothermia. Hyperthermia is when your body temperature is greater (say, at 38 degrees) than your thermoregulatory set-point, which is completely normal at 37 degrees Celsius. Fever is when your body temperature is less (say, at 38 degrees) than your thermoregulatory set-point, which is COMPLETELY ABNORMAL at 39 degrees Celsius. It doesn’t matter what your absolute temperature is; your temperature relative to your thermoregulatory set-point causes you to feel warm or cold. So, when you have a fever, your thermoregulatory set-point rises to above normal, and you feel cold because your body temperature is lower than your new thermoregulatory set-point. When your body temperature rises to match your new thermoregulatory set-point, you feel warm again. #themoreyouknow
C’mon, I’ve got a 39.7 degree (Celsius! NOT FAHRENHEIT!) fever, you should be proud of me for coming up with even a lame pun like that.
So I’ve got the most splitting headache, have been lying in bed for the past eighteen hours, and I accidentally ingested Advil because I thought I had a fever when really I’ve got a viral infection. I wish O-New were a viral infection; then everybody would read our posts. On the other hand, everybody, everywhere will laugh at the QUALITY of our posts forever and ever and ever ._.
Anyways, note to self: when you have a viral infection, DO NOT SWALLOW ADVIL (nor anvils) because it will make you feel the most nauseous since you were forced to sit in a bus seat with your backpack suffocating yourself because of your carsickness. I never sit down on the bus. B(
In conclusion, I finally realized that what I dream about is always influenced by my outside environment. Is it freezing? Then I dream of standing in the dark outside the central public library while all the streetlights broke and some rabid werewolf chases me up into a military-grade cargo elevator that leads up into the main library when a really cute girl walks by and then I realize that I’m naked. Am I excessively sweating from excessive amounts of Tylenol? Then I dream of excessively sweating from excessive amounts of Tylenol. Except, no, I don’t dream, I stay awake sweating for an hour
P.S. Getting a doctor’s note for missing my French and Science project presentations costs $15 because it’s not covered by the Medical Services Plan. When I grow up, I want to be a doctor’s-note-writer. If I write one every 5 minutes, I’ll earn like, $180 an hour.
P.P.S. This post is too shot, so have a video of my hand.
Urgh. So I’ve got a fever. This is extremely bad because a) next week is the last day of school b) I just bombed my Chinese school final because of my headache c) next week is the last day of school d) this means I have to finally finish (start) my science fair project, some science ‘building challenge’ contraption (don’t ask), three socials essays (including one book review of a library book that not only did I not read, but I also lost), English essay, and French project (which az did the entirety of last time, poor guy.
So I’ve got a fever. And a headache. And this disturbing lymph node in the middle of my neck which I thought at first was a tumour. OK, I’M BAD AT ANATOMY OK?! DON’T JUDGE ME. Last night, I dreamt I was in a giant domed IMAX theatre whose screen extended up to the top of the dome for 360 degrees. Unfortunately, the entirety of the film (about Touhou bullet patterns) was projected onto the top, and I felt an overwhelming surge of nausea and chest pain/pressure when I tried to look up. Eventually, I got a heart attack (or my perception of it) and died because I couldn’t even talk from the pressure.
Then I woke up. So I’ve got a fever. I’ll probably lie around in bed all day tomorrow and not hand in any of my assignments. Remember my post about summer lethargy? No, of course you don’t, nobody read that; but it wasn’t lethargy from summer I was suffering, it was another fever! I felt cold so I put on a jacket, but I was still cold after that, and when I took off my jacket, I was still cold. That was supposed to be more eloquent but what I mean is that this isn’t a cold and it’s a fever. Don’t ask me what the difference is.
So I’ve got a fever. Prepare for filler posts this entire weekend. But for now: a week in O-New, reviewed. Az posted both Episode 8 of Jormungand and Episode 9, so he’s got nothing more to write while I continue being sick for this weekend. I started two weekly projects this week: Musical Mondays (don’t expect music next Monday, I’m sick), and Vendredis de Vacances (don’t expect a vacation next Friday, I’m sick).
So I’ve got a fever. But that doesn’t stop redball from publishing the best guest post on O-New so far. That’s not saying much, but do give Hypocrisy in Sankarea a sanka-read. See what I did there? Probably not, but that’s because it’s not me that’s sick, it’s you. I’ve merely got a fever.
tl;dr: I get sick, click every link in this post, nobody cares, goodnight
[This drama took place around Valentine's Day, 2012. Thus, it is now old and not worth discussion. Please refrain from linking this post anywhere; this post exists in its unprotected, unedited entirety for archival purposes only.]
If anybody takes offence with this article, just tell me and I’ll pull it off. This article will be about the twitter drama, and thus, if you participated, I’ll probably call you bad names. This is because I like calling people names.
<!–more You have been warned»
1. Some girl attacked somebody for their silly anime avatar, among other things.
3. vuc gets drunk and calls SabishiiMiruku out on Twitter.
5. Fallout occurs when others defend SabishiiMiruku’s actions.
Firstly: that girl that attacked somebody was a jerk.
Secondly: when somebody attacks a friend for their silly anime avatar, don’t be misogynistic and escalate the conflict after she starts not giving a fuck. No, making fun of people doesn’t make you seem smooth or cool; it’s immature, irresponsible, and stupid. SabishiiMiruku was a jerk.
Thirdly: vuc acted swiftly and appropriately to SabishiiMiruku’s puerile rantings on SCCSAV. However, after a person ends a discussion and wishes to avoid conflict, is spreading the controversy on Twitter really the polite thing to do? SabishiiMiruku was definitely retarded, but calling him out on Twitter is honestly pretty jerky. Beef jerky. There are better ways to instil respect for societal customs in racist teenagers, including friendly discussion, private messaging, and not stirring up legions of bored folks to ridicule some kid. Vuc, although SabishiiMiruku’s repeated e-mails were provoking, although you may have had a hard day and you weren’t thinking straight at the time, although SabishiiMiruku may have deserved it, you were still a jerk.
Fourthly: Bandwagon-hopping. Before someone tu quoques me, yes, I am an unrepentant asshole who incessantly mocks others during times of drama. Yes, mocking people is funny, especially when they’re jerks. No, them being jerks or it being funny are not grounds for public mockery. Although vuc originally intended the mockery to teach a kid that misogyny and racism is unacceptable, the indistinctness of the bandwagon perverted the lesson. SabishiiMiruku no doubt perceived the derision as a slight to his avatar usage, as opposed to his unacceptable behaviour. I want to use a different word because semantic satiation is making ‘jerk’ seem like not a word, but… you’re all jerks.
Fifthly: SabishiiMiruku, why the fuck did you even reply to anybody’s tweets? Sure, what they said may have unnerved you, but you’ve been through enough drama to know the utter pointlessness of being on the receiving end of the stick. It’s not entertaining, it’s not respectful (especially the tweet about blue collar jobs), and it’s the stupidest thing you could ever do in such a situation. Do what nichdel told you. What do you mean, ‘I tried to walk away, but to no avail’?! JUST DISCONNECT YOUR MOTHERFUCKING INTERNET!!
(Condolences to your mother, by the way: I hope the Internet wasn’t too rough with her.)
Every single person who participated in the drama are jerks, assholes, or retarded faggots. Maybe just jerks or assholes; the likelihood of any here being academically challenged bundles of wood is quite small. Similarly, it is hard to imagine the composition of an asshole: is it the part of the ass that surrounds the hole? Is it the inside of the ass’s hole? If so, does one being an asshole make one a concentration of nitrogen and oxygen?
tl;dr: you’re all jerks. Even if SabishiiMiruku deserved what you were giving him, that doesn’t make you any less of a jerk. If a cat punches you in the face and you bite his arm off, it doesnt matter if the cat deserved it: you still bit his arm off. fuck the bandwagon, I heard it feels good
P.S. If you’re offended by this article, just tell me and I’ll make it less offending. Yes, I am talking about people behind their backs because not only am I a spineless coward, but many people involved are genuinely sick and tired of the whole business. I wish flomu were here
P.P.S. If you guys want to mock me for writing this article, don’t worry, I’ve already mocked myself enough
P.P.P.S. I’m not publicizing this on Twitter because stirring up additional controversy is antithetical to number 3. “But wait!” you probably won’t think, “If you wanted to avoid drama in the first place, why did you make this fucking post?” THE ONLY REASON I WROTE THIS IS BECAUSE NOBODY ELSE IS WRITING POSTS AND THUS I MUST WRITE CRAP NOBODY CARES ABOUT and also because nobody visits O-New ever nobody will ever find this post and thus, no more drama
P.P.P.P.S. Yes, I know, I’m probably the biggest asshole in the lot of ya. But you’re still all jerks. Is this a personal attack? No. Is this a disparaging remark? Possibly. Is this an objective look at the result of this turmoil. Yes. The actions of all parties involved were disrespectful and base, regardless of whether they were warranted or not.