You know how our season previews go. There’s a basic formula to all of them. First, a summary, then a picture, then a disclaimer talking about how I stole all this information from other blogs, and then the actual post, written by me, Mushyrulez, all by myself.
WELL GUESS WHAT?! WE’RE SWITCHING THINGS UP A BIT THIS YEAR. How?
Firstly, there WON’T BE A PICTURE after a summary which is this summary which is this sentence and the sentences immediately before and after this. In fact, THERE MAY NOT BE ANY PICTURES AT ALL!!!
Secondly, there WON’T BE A DISCLAIMER after a picture because, wow, we’ve actually done NO research this time!! That means no embedded chart, no witty quips, no snide references to MAL, no NOTHING AT ALL. Since there’s something. You can’t have nothing if you have something, which is why we don’t have nothing. In fact, this new preview is so much worse than older previews that we recommend you just read the older ones instead!!
Thirdly, there WON’T BE ANY TRAILER LINKS because we’re too lazy to go search them up for you!! I know, simply horrible, right? WRONG, because it takes you lazy ducks all of ten seconds to go search ‘generic fanservice shit anime #101 trailer’ on YouTube while it takes us thirty to embed said trailer onto our page. No, we’re not being hypocritical, we’re being hyper-critical. Of your laziness.
Finally, we’re not going to spend thirty million hours writing this post and adding stupid ‘potential’ ratings so that we can publish it before we’re ten weeks into the season.
Thirty hours is enough.
Proud hosters of the thirty-hour Fanime»
(Heya, take a look at this STEINS;GATE BOUKAN NO REBELLION 9 POST! I’m only advertising this on this post because I know this post is going to get the most hits, considering the time we poured into the making of it.)
Alright, I’m sure you’ve all been looking forward to this.
Hello, fans of O-New.
We’re here with your 2012 Spring Anime Preview.
I’m not even joking»
So, what did I learn from writing season previews?
Rule 1 of writing season previews: Don’t write season previews after everybody else does.
Rule 2 of writing season previews: Do not write season previews after the previous season has already ended.
Rule 3 of writing season previews: DO NOT write season previews after the season’s shows have already started.
Rule 4 of writing season previews: DO NOT WRITE SEASON PREVIEWS after all the season’s shows have already started.
Rule 5 of writing season previews: DO NOT WRITE SEASON PREVIEWS AFTER THE SEASON IS OVER!
Rule 6 of writing season previews: Do not talk about writing season previews»
Woah, woah, woah. You didn’t think that I’d publish these 2012 Winter Anime (Preview) posts every other day, did you? When you saw that 2012 Winter Anime (Preview) Part Two, you didn’t think that my 2012 Winter Anime (Preview) Part Three would be published today, did you? Well, guess what? It’s not going to be published today. And I can’t write them every other day. They take too much time. For themselves. They should learn to share all that time they take.
Sharing is caring»
[Suspicious Announcement: It's a very special day tomorrow; bonus special crackers to anybody who can guess what that day is...]
Woah, woah, woah. You didn’t think that that was the end, did you? Did you miss that ‘2012 Winter Anime PART ONE’ at the end of the post title? Or are you wondering why I’m using rhetorical questions in a post about anime previews? Let me first tell you that I am a master at rhetoric. Some people can’t even toric normally, but I toric over and over and over again.
In which I continue writing about anime even though nobody needs to read my posts to know what’s airing, especially since most things are already aired. OH WELL
I say 2012 Winter Anime Part One because I changed the 2011 Winter tags to 2012 Winter, and the 2010 Winter tags to 2011 Winter. ‘Wait,’ you might think, ‘What’s wrong with 2010 Winter?’ Nothing, which is why I changed the title of this post from 2011 Winter Anime to 2012 Winter Anime Part One.
Everybody knows that Winter is the last season of the year, right? Too bad it isn’t in the strange world of anime, where it’s actually the first season of the year. Actually, I was lying about that changing thing. My 2011 Winter Preview is still my 2010 Winter Preview. But now I don’t actually have a post called 2011 Winter Anime, because the Winter of 2011 is this Winter, but in anime, this Winter is the Winter of 2012… what I’m trying to say is, it’s Part One because I’m splitting this post into three parts. Hooray!
Hopefully this Winter will be better than last Winter, where there were a grand total of two good shows (Madoka and Level E). *shudder*
I shudder because it’s cold»