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Justin Bieber “One time” Commentary

Before I even begin, I would like to note one thing.

He says “Lemme tell you ONE TIME”. Guess how many times he says it in the song. Well, I’ll answer for you. He says it 29 times. Justin Bieber, get your math straight.

The lyrics will be in italics, my rant is in normal font.

Me plus you, I’m a tell you one time
Me plus you, I’m a tell you one time
Me plus you, I’m a tell you one time
Me plus you equals meyou. There are not enough statements to come to a proper conclusion.

One Time
One Time
Honestly, he should be saying “Four time” and “Five time” by now.

When I met you girl my heart went knock knock
Somebody must have written you name in a death note.

Now them butterflies in my stomach wont stop stop
Always chew 30 times before you swallow, you obviously didn’t do that.

And even though it’s a struggle, love is all we got
What about life? And beer? And bananas? You probably have those too, count properly.

So we gonna keep keep climbin till the mountain top
Woah, suddenly a mountain comes in.

Your world is my world
Really? Your world is my world too! Unless you’re some alien from Mars.

And my fight is your fight
Violence is never the answer.

My breath is your breath
Okay, that’s getting a little intense here. *slowly backs away*

And your heart (I got my)
er…

You’re my One love
Sorry, Justin, never gonna happen. Look at the height difference between you two.

My one heart
I knew about artificial hearts and pig hearts but having other people? That’s new.

My one life for sure
Alright, that’s just awkward.

Let me tell you one time (girl I love, girl I love you)
I’m a tell you one time (girl I love, girl I love you)
And I’m a be your one guy
You’ll be my #1 girl always makin time for you
I’m’a tell you one time (girl I love, girl I love you)
I’m’a tell you one time (girl I love, girl I love you)
Repetitive much? 4 lines saying the same thing.

You look so deep
Is he in love with an ocean or something?

You know that it humbles me
It honestly fits, he’s in love with an ocean.

You’re by my side and troubles them don’t trouble me
O_o He’s Poseidon, the ocean is at his side.

Many have called but the chosen is you
Well, what else would Poseidon pick other than oceans? Mushrooms?
Whatever you want shawty I’ll give it to you
Dude, you’re Poseidon but some things you just can’t give.
For example: well’s off the coast of Finland, stealing them would just be rude.

Your world is my world
And my fight is your fight
My breath is your breath
And your heart (I got my)
And here we go again, repetition!

Your my One love
My one heart
My one life for sure
Let me tell you one time (girl I love, girl I love you)
I’m a tell you one time (girl I love, girl I love you)
And I’m a be your one guy
You’ll be my #1 girl always makin time for you
I’m’a tell you one time (girl I love, girl I love you)
I’m’a tell you one time (girl I love, girl I love you)
Repetition is annoying, you get the feeling you’re reading the same sentence twice. Repetition is annoying, you get the feeling you’re reading the same sentence twice. Repetition is annoying, you get the feeling you’re reading the same sentence twice.

Shawty right there
HIDDEN MESSAGE: He’s talking to Shaw, telling them thank you (ty). When you put them together, SHAWTY!

She’s got everything I need and I’m a tell her one time
You’re a god, Poseidon. You don’t need anything.

One Time, One Time
Repetition, it’s just lame now. T_T

Give you everything you need down to my last dime
What about nickles you scrooge, keeping all your nickels.

She makes me happy
O rly? She makes me feel average.

I know where I’ll be
And how do you know that? DO you have a map?

Right by your side cuz she is the one
[Insert witty comment here]

And girl
Soooo sexist. What about boys?

You’re my One love
My one heart
My one life for sure
Let me tell you one time (girl I love, girl I love you)
I’m a tell you one time (girl I love, girl I love you)
And I’m a be your one guy
You’ll be my #1 girl always makin time for you
I’m a me tell you one time (girl I love, girl I love you)
I’m a tell you one time (girl I love, girl I love you)

Me plus you, I’m a tell you one time
Me plus you, I’m a tell you one time
Me plus you, I’m a tell you one time

One Time
One Time

STOP THE REPETITION, THIS IS MADNESS!!!!

Overall conclusion: Justin Bieber is actually Poseidon in disguise, he’s in love with an ocean but before he can marry her he needs to work on his math skills. Also, he needs to make his songs less repetitive (continue including secret messages to people though).

6 responses

  1. flaredarknight

    Kill him!KILL HIM WITH FIRE!

    2010/07/09 at 09:33

  2. You must contact Count Olaf’s gang though, there the only people who know how to burn stuff like lakes, swimming pools and oceans. If you try burning Poseidon yourself, you’ll become the next fatality.

    2010/07/09 at 15:18

  3. Oh gawd I haven’t laughed this hard for a loooong time

    2010/07/09 at 20:20

  4. Hehe, should this be continued?

    2010/07/10 at 03:35

  5. flaredarknight

    http://www.pictogame.com/en/play/game/h82mEh2VcDKw_kill-justin-bieber ———-KILL HIM WITH GUN WITH RED EYES!!!

    2010/07/10 at 09:54

  6. YES… Now if only somebody could create a game where you must create clones that seek out Justin Bieber and kill him.

    2010/07/10 at 12:37