(My thoughts about Harry Potter 7.5 are included in the second half of this post.)
“She calls it the USS Lexington…”
The boxing starts for real now.
Alternatively, I could make this a post that could be received in two entirely different ways, but being a pure-hearted individual myself, I won’t.
It’s funny the entirely different ways they teach boxing in Buyuden and RRR – while one is much more suited to children, the other is just ‘ok here you go FUCKING RUN THREE HUNDRED KILOMETRES NOW ok are you finished time to START BOXING WITH NO PRACTISE ok now PUNCH PUNCH PUNCH PUNCH PUNCH oh sorry your face fell off but GET BACK TO RUNNING ANYWAYS’. Although it seems not, the main character of Buyuden is still Isamu – the story is about Isamu learning to box, not Moka continuing to box.
I never knew you actually needed bandages to protect your hands, but they actually do work – they prevent your thumb from dislocating, protect your bones from cracking, absorbs impacts, and the like, to the point that you really can’t box without hand wraps. Mmmm, hand wraps. I wonder if McDonalds sells them? I also wonder what they would taste like. Ingredients: tortilla, celery, tomato, mayonnaise… hand.
Finally, the translations. The onomatopoeia translation is a bit excessively ridiculous in this one. I don’t know about the quality of these translations – is a carrier a real boxing term? ‘Mass boxing’ doesn’t seem to be a commonly used phrase, either – perhaps it’s known as something else in the West? Nevertheless, the translator does at least know some boxing terms (maybe ‘mass boxing’ was written in katakana, and the translator is more proficient in Japanese than in English, and just wrote it down as ‘mass boxing’ instead of, I don’t know, ‘practice boxing’ or ‘no hands boxing’ or ‘no hit boxing’ or ‘Christmas boxing’?).
tl;dr: Harry Potter spoilers coming up, and what gender is Watari, anyways?!
“But, what if somebody takes my first away?”
So, I hope you were prepared for HARRY POTTER long opinion-essay-report.
And the Deathly Hallows Part Two Spoilers.
There’s really not much to spoil if you’ve read the book, though there are several huge big enormous changes: Grawp doesn’t participate in the war, Crabbe’s Fiendfyre isn’t explained, McGonagall defeats Snape on her own, and the like – things that save time. Although I understand they want to add less talking, more action, some things just feel ridiculous – Harry throws away the Resurrection Stone instead of destroying it; the Snitch being caught in Harry’s mouth isn’t re-explained, even in a flashback; Harry doesn’t even tell us what he thought to enter the Room of Requirement; and of course, how the heck did Bill and Fleur have goblin-sized clothing at their cottage?! That part was the straw that broke the camel’s back – Harry Potter is just ridiculous!
Yet, sometimes, the movie tries to add more reason, explaining how Voldemort’s soul is in Harry and why they suspected things to be Horcruxes. Yet, by doing that, other things are simply almost skipped over – it was particularly sad seeing Snape’s emotional segment cut so short. If I hadn’t read the book, I’d have no idea what was going on.
Nevertheless, the music in the movie is simply \ amazing /. Throughout, the orchestration is brilliant, and the three-note Touhou-esque motif was just wonderful. It’s not really a blend of different styles, but the composer does try to find variation. And, the director also knows when not having music is better – sometimes, such as Dumbledore talking to Harry in limbo, or Harry appearing in front of Voldemort, having no music sets the mood just as much as having it would. Once again, absolutely amazing.
My conclusion: 2/10. It would’ve gotten a 10/10 (seeing as I almost never ever watch movies), but it lost 9 points because I imagined the dragon in Gringotts to be red (even though Rowling doesn’t say anything about its colour) when I was reading the book and when I read books, it’s usually exactly the same as the movie (seriously, I thought I had already watched this movie when it first started because I ALREADY DID WATCH IT BEFORE, WHEN I WAS READING THE BOOK!), but when the dragon appeared, I thought it would be red, and IT WAS WHITE-ISH! That just completely blew my mind and suddenly the movie got really boring. Add 5 points for having good music, and add another 1 point because Neville was so stupid when the bridge was set on fire, but that was the best scene in the movie. Add another point because Neville tried to kill Nagini with the sword but got knocked back instead and woke up looking stoned. Minus six points for being in 3D and thus hurting my eyes, minus another six points for having loud music and hurting my ears, and plus six points because the 3D didn’t really hurt my eyes. It was actually pretty blurry, because I wear correcting contacts that shape my cornea, but only during night, so after >14 hours my vision starts getting worse and worse and maybe that’s why I thought it sucked. Finally, minus twenty points for not showing Neville throwing plants at the Death Eaters and plus twenty points for implying a Neville x Luna end, for a grand total of 2/10. I think. I suck at math. Maybe that’s actually 0.2/10 or 20/10. I don’t have 20/20 vision. I don’t have 20/10 or 10/20 vision either. I think I’m pretty average.
I guess I can’t really blame the movie too much – the book felt to me like it was rushing things and adding things the author didn’t plan to in the last two books, that Rowling didn’t plan the entire Horcrus thing and made it up after the fifth book was finished. Perhaps I ought to rewatch + reread the first movie and book – I’m sure the writing style’s completely different.
tl;dr The movie was good shit, watch it. The ending made me shiver so much I now have a cold (writing this just an hour after the movie finished), really, the conclusion of seven entire years of work (seven years for Harry, not for Rowling) has to be something amazing. Also here’s a picture of Moka cause this is a Buyuden post. What the heck does Buyuden even mean?
P.S. Haripota should be made into a 26-episode anime. It’d have around the same time-length as the movies, obviously (well, make each episode half an hour long and it’d be… longer than the movies? I think?)
P.P.S. Do you know why Harry’s a Potter? CAUSE HIS FATHER POTS
P.P.P.S. Man I wrote all this down on a lottery ticket in green ink while the movie was playing, but the movie was so dark I couldn’t see anything and now I only see a bunch of scribbles on the lottery ticket. :(
P.P.P.P.S. I didn’t win the lottery, either.