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O-NEG 15: Hell

The game is not, verbatim, called “hell”.

However, the game is, verbatim, “hell”.

Mud and Blood 2, by Unfair Realistic Brutality… Z (“urbz”) is a game about you being a British squad commander holding off infinite waves of Germans while your “Headquarters” supposedly moves. Oddly enough, the HQ never seems to finish moving no matter how many games you play, but I suppose there’s some sort of perfectly good “reason” for this. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I have a blitz wave artillery strike to cower in fear from.

MnB2 combines elements of tower defense with an Real Time Strategy game and blackjack as well as an idle game. The only reason I say blackjack is because of the fact that you WILL get dealt a bad hand (or the MnB2 equivalent, the Blitz Wave.). Or maybe that’s just me. I suck at blackjack. Hmmm.

In any case, MnB2 is not an active game, or a fast-paced one. While you do control your squad of soldiers, you do not control their shooting. They do that automatically, which sounds good on paper. Of course, this is the type of paper that CAR SALESMEN use, which means that the bottom half of the paper is solely dedicated to fine print, which in this case would contain all the clauses stating that your men tend to miss. A lot. Even with shotguns at point blank range. Did I mention that your men get pinned down easily? And have limited morale?

In any case, clicking on enemies will, by default, do nothing. It will tell you some random technical details about the Historical Name of the enemy and their weapons and whatever, but you will not win by clicking every enemy as soon as they pop up from the top of the screen.

At this point, it is important to note several things:
1. The enemy Germans will shoot your men, but their main goal is to bypass your lines and supposedly “assault your HQ”. This doesn’t really seem to happen, although these flankers do have nasty, nasty effects as the game progresses…
2. The game is very, very unfair.
3. The game is based on Murphy’s Law(s).
4. The game is VERY, VERY unfair.
5. Not all units are trying to pass your lines. HINTgermanmortar, homicidaldirtbagindeedHINT.

Now, if you could PREDICT the enemy movements, this game would be EASY.

This is where the luck/blackjack component comes in: Unfair Events, Blitz Waves, Enemy Artillery, and Enemy Aerial Support can come and ruin your day. And they do their job well.

Even if you are lucky enough to not have these evil things land on your men within the first 50 waves, that doesn’t mean that the Germans are not allowed to drop units on your position, or spawn flamethrower-wielding units, or use snipers and Brandenburg Infiltrators (CURSE YOU STEALTHY GERMANS, AND ALSO THE STUPID BUTTERFLY KNIFE), or send in, god forbid, a Wespes tank on the first wave. They can spawn. They will spawn.

But the worst things are probably the Blitz Waves.

Of all the aspects of the game, they represent Hell most accurately.

Be it a Paratrooper Blitz Wave (10 Paratroopers fall all over the map), an Artillery Blitz Wave (up to 20 rounds of artillery on your position), a Special Weapons Blitz Wave (Flamethrowers and Panzershreks), or the kinda-hard-to-say Panzerkampfwagon Blitz Wave (a tank and 3 kubelwagons), they devastate and destroy anybody who does not have any access to air support at all, with the slight exception of the Volkssturm, which can kinda be handled without air support because of how much they suck.

It is a good game.

It is not an easy game.

It’s a game you will have to play for a long, long time.

It’s a game with achievements, and in-game medals with (gasp) BENEFITS (could you imagine?).

But play it. If you get owned, play it some more. Try not to give all your idiotic Frenchies the BAR MG’s, though.

You can find it on mochigames (which, as a site, sucks, but has the most recent version) or Kongregate (less recent version but cooler site).

2 responses

  1. Herp derp when’s MnB 3 going to come out :|

    2011/09/04 at 21:48

  2. I like how all of the soldiers turn into a piles of grilled meat,when they get hit by an explosive weapon.

    Now I’m hungry… ;_;

    2011/09/06 at 22:18