O-New: Now Extinct Website

Tower of God Manga Quarterly Review 2


Y’know what?

I was right.

Writing episodic animanga posts (see: Ben-To, Horizon, ST&RS, and Majikoi) is much, MUCH quicker to finish ANY other kind of animanga post.

I mean, the posts take around the same amount of time (~an hour to two hours), and even the word counts are probably similar (except for Kurimagane Posts), but that’s not the point. The point is that watching one episode of an anime takes half an hour. Reading one chapter of a manga takes ten minutes. Now, reading thirteen chapters of a manga takes two and a half hours, and watching six episodes of an anime takes three hours!

So now you know why my recent posts are so late. They take a long time to write. Even more with my season previews; just that last one yesterday took, what, two hours? Just to write it. I didn’t even research for any information!

Gosh, I have a headache from all this late-writing. :(

Anyways, remember this manhwa?

…Neither do I. I guess I was lucky that Fabian inadvertently reminded me that this existed, or else there would be no post today, because there’s really nothing else I can post. There’s no new ST&RS chapter, no new Gangsta, and I only found out about a new Ore no Kouhai chapter, uh, right now. And it’s hard to, y’know, write a post for today when I’ve already published this post for today, which was actually yesterday because today is tomorrow. You (don’t) know what I mean.

What else could I write?! Even writing an O-REW takes time. Yeah, funny thing, those text on the screen? They were written by a person. Isn’t that strange? And that person, right now, is very, VERY busy. Writing posts. For a blog. On the Internet. Instead of finishing his Socials project. I think houraiguy should write a post about Terraria. Or a post about me forcing him to write a post about Terraria. Suddenly, my writers are now burgers.

“…and burgers give me money! And write posts. In exchange for money. The money that they gave me. Yeah. I also have green skin. And I’m a girl. Pretty cool stuff here.”

Of course, after that long soliloquy (new O-Neword of the day!) talking about how posting Manga Quarterly Reviews takes a long time and how writing a normal anime post would be much better, why am I publishing this Manga Quarterly Review?

Well, I haven’t finished my season preview yet, so I can hardly post about any anime. But more importantly, Fabian’s comment reminded me that I actually had a near-finished Tower of God post up, a post that was written in December 20th, 2010 (I guess that’s when I finished reading the chapters), and finished in April 22nd, 2011 (I guess that’s when I decided to, y’know, actually write the post). A near-finished post?! You can imagine my exhilaration when I discovered such a treasure!

Unfortunately, it’s an old post. It even has .pngs, that are 1024 pixels across (right now, I only use .jpgs that are 768 pixels across). And, it has my writing style of the past.

So, there’s really no point to reading past this line. This line is the plane of yes return. If you pass through this plane, you’ll head off into space. Don’t go off into space, lest you accidentally wander into tetraspace, which is actually a tetrapace. A trap.

(and the trap is him)

The end.

Don’t be bothered if you don’t understand what happens next. You’re not supposed to. And I don’t understand it, either, because I haven’t read Tower of God for thirteen months. I’M A GOOD BLOGGER AREN’T I

2010 writing starts… now.

The District 3 Test Administrator, Quant, had a 30-minute deathmatch – with only three people surviving at the end.

Apparently both Zahard’s (if you’ll remember, the King) daughter and an Irregular were in that group of three, whatever that means.

Anyways, Lero-ro decides to conduct a ‘Crown Game’, a bonus game that allows the winners to directly advance to the next floor.

The goal is to steal the crown from other players – if you have it at the end of 10 minutes, you win the round. If you have it at the end of the 5th round, you win the game.

You also win if you sit on the throne with the crown on your head within 5 minutes of the round’s start.

Anyways, it’s more complicated than that so I won’t explain it.

From the hive that’s nuts about honey?

The lizard girl, Anak, challenges the weird church-zombie team alone – and wins. Easily.

Unfortunately, because she’s wearing the crown, she cannot move from the throne she’s sitting on for the next four rounds – meaning that their team has to win all four next rounds to beat the game. That you just lost.

The next round has two teams challenge – one with weird alien people and one with that weird sleeping guy.

Hatsu uses his swords that fly lower and higher than any to completely obliterate the weird aliens and Ship Leesoo uses his (nonexistent) KILLER ARTS, but nothing happens.

Suddenly the sleeping guy, Laure uses a fantasy seal to deal massive amounts of damage.

However, Anak is still alive, and goes on a mass marketing scheme to generate tons of money.

She then proceeds to steal Baam’s Black March, one of the thirteen month weapons created by Edwaru, that only the King’s daughter was supposed to have (Lady Yuri).

If Black March wasn’t already taken I’d expect this to be the Black Friday

It is revealed that Anak is also Zahard’s daughter (how many daughter’s does he have?! There’s Yuri, Anak, and that other person who slaughtered 197 people in half an hour. He probably has thirteen, and gave each of them a sword or something), and thus Lady Yuri’s sister. Wait, how can Zahard give birth to a lizard?!

Her weapon is the Green April, a sword that can bend its shape and size (and split into numerous other swords) – which is why she decided to sit on the throne.

Just before she stabs everyone to death and takes the Black March, Lero-ro shows off his annoyingness and rick rolls them all.

Nevertheless, Anak decides to wager a bet – if Baam’s team wins all subsequent rounds, she hands over her Green April and doesn’t target the Black March for the remainder of the… whatever they’re doing. If they lose a single match, Black March is hers.

Baam accepts, ’cause Anak’s gonna kill him anyways if he doesn’t.

The third round starts, with four teams now competing…

But Koon somehow gets to the throne at lightning-speed, tries to tell the others to fight among themselves for the crown, but his annoyingness makes everyone want to kill him.

However, some small raccoon-person decides to steal the crown first…

Really, ToG is pretty racist. I mean, a green guy wields a green weapon. How much more racist can that be?

Though I’ll bet by the end, Rak will take possession of the Red October…

So, as all the people attack Koon at once, his briefcase, Manbarondena, decides to eat this weird shadow demon thingy. Undisturbed, they still continue fighting and fighting so there’s nothing else to say.

Then they suddenly win because Baam froze the Shinsoo around him or something, and Koon reveals what his briefcase really is – the Annarasumanara, a briefcase capable of cloning – be it butcher’s knives into longswords or crowns into… more crowns. The crown he threw out at the beginning wasn’t really the real crown, either.


Next round, Koon reveals his (her?) cunningness; during the first test, he knew that someone would eventually kill the other 200 regulars, so using that time, he made a pact with the other useful people, that he would help them through some of the tests, and they would help him through the other.

His bag’s basically bottomless, so he just stuffed all of those allies into his bag – which is also why the bag almost didn’t go through Lero-ro’s Shinsoo barrier. That’s also why the administrator of the doors test commented on his briefcase being rather heavy – of course it is, if it’s filled with people!

Finally, before the game started, he pretended to go to the washroom, when in reality, he was actually letting the people out of his bag.

Eventually, since all contestants of the round lost (the people who were helping Koon, who seemed to include one of Zahard’s 99 daughters), the win went to Koon’s team.

More so than oh bomb a?

The final round starts with all four remaining teams up for the kill – including the team of an irregular and another Zahard’s daughter (this Zahard guy is quite the… man) who killed everyone else before.

They kill everyone else now, too. Or rather, one person (or is she a Dullahan? She doesn’t seem to have a human head) does, with the help of a flying spear.


A flying spear.

Just as Baam’s about to get stabbed, Lahel stops the speardullahan.

Wait, what?

[2011 Edit: That’s right. You heard me in the past. Lahel stops the serialization. THE END NO MORE TOWER OF GOD FOR YOU bye


P.S. Look at the RESEMBLANCE between these two characters who are actually, wait for it… THE SAME PERSON. Yep, totally the same, don’t mind the eye change and hair change and nose change and chin change and eyebrows change and skin colour change and mouth change, they’re the same person. Yep, yep, just gotta look closely to confirm it.

3 responses

  1. Pingback: 2012 Winter Anime Part Two « O-New

  2. Didn’t bother reading too much of the post itself, as I am a busy, busy person. Well, busy procrastinating, that is. Anyway, I love this manhwa. I think it’s the second webtoon I started reading, and it keeps on getting better. You should pick it up again. Some of the newer chapters had some awesome twists.~_~ < –Attempt at tilde smiley.– > ~_~

    2012/01/17 at 02:40

  3. Yes I’m picking this up!!!!!1112132414dfae you should blog about it so that I can link to your blog and drive some of my traffic there

    2012/01/17 at 04:17