Pointlessly Stupid Anime Translations: A Hadena Test
This afternoon, az and I both took the PSAT (Practice SAT? Preparatory SAT? Puerile SAT? Pregnant SAT?) test. That is not a manifestation of RAS syndrome, because SAT doesn’t stand for ‘Scholastic Aptitude Test’. It’s just… SAT. I took the test because it’s mandatory for everyone in my class; az took the test because he’s weird.
It was only after the final Writing Skills section that I realized just how Dark_Sage manages to critique fansubs so well. There was no other conceivable explanation: Dark_Sage must be a disgruntled SAT tutor for spoiled rich brats. Unable to suppress his inner rage at their stupidity, Dark_Sage sought catharsis through a more respectable medium: fansub reviews.
Why? Well, let’s just reproduce some sample PSAT questions, Hadena style. I won’t take screenshots because I want to retain my brain cells until after my socials presentation, so instead, let’s analyze the comments of arashi0 and his team (who are truly “in [their] own world”) on their own website, over the past three months.
I realize that the quality of their comments are substandard to the ‘quality’ of their much-edited script, and so I have omitted both sentences without proper capitalization/punctuation and sentences written facetiously. (Ridiculing others’ comments would be unreasonably offensive, especially to those attempting to learn English. As demonstrated in numerous schools, derogatory remarks generally hinder students’ linguistic development. Then again, so does Hadena…)
In short: a test. Answers at the bottom. Record your answers somewhere so you can compare your answers with mine. Post my test-creating mistakes as comments. There are probably mistakes. They are not intentional.
Time – 5 minutes
8 Questions (1-6)
Instructions: The following sentences test correctness and effectiveness of expression. Part of each sentence or the entire sentence is italicized; beneath each sentence are five ways of phrasing the italicized material. Choice A repeats the original phrasing; the other four choices are different. If you think the original phrasing produces a better sentence than any of the alternatives, select choice A; if not, select one of the other choices.
In making your selection, follow the requirements of standard written English; that is, pay attention to grammar, choice of words, sentence construction, and punctuation. Your selection should result in the most effective sentence – clear and precise, without awkwardness or ambiguity.
Example: Laura Ingalls Wilder published her first book and she was sixty-five years old then.
(A) and she was sixty-five years old then
(B) when she was sixty-five
(C) at age sixty-five years old
(D) upon the reaching of sixty-five years
(E) at the time when she was sixty-five
Correct Answer: (B)
- Make sure to put this file in the same folder where the video file is.
(A) where the video file is
(B) at the place of the video file
(C) as the video file is placed
(D) where the video file’s folder is
(E) as the video file
- I translate everything in this place except mentioned otherwise.
(A) except mentioned otherwise
(B) unless when mentioned otherwise
(C) except when otherwise mentioned
(D) except when I mention it otherwise
(E) unless otherwise mentioned
- Sorry for the inconsistency, folks, but recently I have been spacing out a bit too much…
- This release is late, cause I had to find a timer awake to do this show.
(A) a timer awake
(B) a timer who was still awake
(C) an alarm timer
(D) an awakened timer
(E) an awoken tiger
- We did an original translation for this episode, like ep 05, unlike few others…
(A) unlike few others
(B) unlike many episodes
(C) unlike a few other groups
(D) unlike a few other Hadenas
(E) unlike few translations
- I checked it myself, so it is problem at your end.
(A) it is problem at your end
(B) the end with the problem is yours
(C) the problem is the end
(D) the end is the problem
(E) it is a problem at your end
(A) I have been spacing out a bit too much
(B) I have been a bit too much spacing out
(C) I have spaces out a bit too much
(D) I was constantly spacing out
(E) I have been in space a bit too much
Time – 10 minutes
14 Questions (7-20)
Instructions: The following sentences test your ability to recognize grammar and usage errors. Each sentence may contain an error, many errors, or no errors at all. The possible errors are italicized with a bracketed letter following. If the sentence contains only one error, select the one italicized part that must be changed to make the sentence correct. If the sentence contains many errors, select the second last choice (when applicable). If the sentence is correct, select the last choice. In choosing answers, follow the requirements of standard written English.
Example: The other (A) delegates and him (B) immediately (C) accepted the resolution drafted by (D) the neutral states. No error (E)
Correct Answer: (B)
- Fansubbing doesn’t pays (A), so we solely (B) depend on fans supporting us (C) to keep things running (D). No error (E)
- Attribute (A) the delayed-early (B) release of a speedsub-delayed (C) show to Pathogen (D). No error (E)
- Reverse (A), it will get 100 times better (B) then it is (C) now. I have seen the release myself (D), and I don’t understand what you people are trolling about. No error (E)
- “Also, you have no right (A) to say a bit better (B), the editing is way better (C) then any of the sub groups out there (D).” No error (E)
- Kuroko 16, 17 is being worked on as well as (A) Kingdom 08. These two will be out before next episodes (B) of these two anime comes out (C). All errors (D) No error (E)
- Yeah, you don’t know any Japanese (A), so shut up. Bring This episode is better then (B) episode one. And you say that there were mistranslations (C) in the script… you need to have a Translator who has been doing his job for 2 years, and make him decide (D). There is no mistranslation (E) in this script.”
- Hmm… YES IT IS THE OFFICIAL LYRICS… BELIEVE IT OR NOT that’s the Engrish from the Japanese. I don’t know who wrote the songs for them. I don’t understand (A)
- Sup. No one likes us no matter how good (A) of a job we do. I can assure you, bro (B), Sukitte ii na yo is ok. You don’t have to worry about what those (C) trollan fags got to say. All errors (D) No error (E)
- Well, the majority are (A) the devs of Communist and fagg subs; also, they are the mods (B) of nyaa… so yeah xD. But we ain’t got nothing (C) against them – this was done (D) to kill time. No error (E)
- The funniest thing is (A), we didn’t encode it [ROFL]. We just got a raw labeled ‘GREEN’[trusted] in the nyaa torrents (B) and used it to sub this, so go to heaven – we are better off in hell (C) without you guys. All errors (D) No error (E)
- The quality of the RAW/ENCODING is none of our fault (A). Please Don’t complain to us. There is no other high quality raw (B) available at the time of release. If you happen to find any contact me (C) via IRC. All errors (D) No error (E)
- I don’t even get why people like you have to come to our website even (A). You don’t like our release, but you are here to give us a lecture telling us what to do and what not (B). I don’t know what type of birdbrain you are, this is EPISODE 05 (C) not ep 04. All errors (D) No error (E)
- Your welcome (A), well you see we have limited time (B). We try to speed sub shows (C). There is only one Translator [myself]. And two editors. (D) What we have been trying to do is to release before horrible-subs/CR simulcast (E), and I think we can achieve that, but considering (F) the amount of time I allot to sub this, it gets problems like of that (G) you have mentioned. Thank you very much for your structural and well oriented (H) compilation of the mistakes [and not blindly bashing it (I) like most of them do], we will try our best to avoid them (J) hereon. All errors (K) No error (L)
- I have to laugh my heads off (A) now. You see, when we release something first (B), people say that we are bad, when we release a proper version (C) with proper Edit and QC (D), people say that we rip other’s script (E). FOR THE INFO: (F) WE DON’T RIP OFF ANYONE’S SCRIPT TO TLC, so try yo (G) grow up on the (H) hating Hadena thing (I), cause it’s really (J) getting annoying. All errors (K) No error (L)
…I give up.
tl;dr: arashi0 had multiple heads before he laughed them off, something about speeding shows about sub sandwiches, arashi0 appreciates mistake compilations as long as they pertain to wells, hadena’s already in hell, etc.
PART ONE: 1-E 2-E 3-A 4-B 5-C 6-E
PART TWO: 7-A 8-C 9-C 10-B 11-D 12-B
13-A 14-E 15-A 16-E 17-D 18-D 19-K 20-K