Gotta admire dem curves.
Coolness, like having curves, is caused by creation, a conceptual cuality that only certain cool cpeople can chave. James (but not Jessie) has this cool coolness. How can you tell? Well, his sunglasses aren’t there just for show. Well, they are just for show, but like, that’s because it /shows/ you not only the reflection of her beautiful eyes but also the reflection of James’s innate coolness.
It is plainly evident that people only go to Sentucky’s to cool down with the cool cashier. I’m sick today because of allergies. I really wish it wasn’t so hot…
Compare Emi’s tomboyish attitude to Suzuno’s polite, almost condescending femininity. While Emi shows the progressive de-sexualization of Ente Islamic society, Suzuno reflects Ente Isla’s reverse unmodernizationability due to her nonassimilation into postcolonial sexual norms. Even confronted with the harsh realities of Nihongo life, she steadfastly refuses to
The stupid slice of life conversations in this episode, the previous episode, and the (n-2, n-3, …, n-k)th episode represents the dullness of city life compared to their previous grandeur and splendour and doors and durrs. They really ram this ennui into our face by protracting their meaningless babbles for half the episode, every episode. Not only is it audiovisual, but simultaneously sensual; often, the urge to sleep overwhelms the urge to stay awake, which gives the entire setting a dreamlike experience.
This is usually because we’re dreaming, i.e. sleeping i.e. not paying attention due to its vapid nonsense.
tl;dr: maou-sama represents the stupidity of life because holy shit is it boring
Hey guys. You might note that as Mushy has gotten back in gear I’ve kicked out of it. That’s not to say that I haven’t been doing anything. If you’ve missed me, you might want to check out my latest piece at Altair & Vega, Reinvention in HenNeko, or at Classy we recently posted a group fanfiction story inspired by OreImo, OreImo: The Fall of Vancouver.
Finally, I must note that this is not a farewell. I will likely write more for O-New as inspiration strikes. I’ll also participate in season previews and reviews, whenever those start happening again. As always, thanks for reading.
The rains were a drizzle on the sidewalk. Red, orange, blue; seventeen rainbow colours dotted the streets in increasingly psychedelic displays of unnatural diversity. On the top of my porch, on the top of my wall; there they lay in the mid-autumn day of mid-fall.
There lay I, musing late in the autumn day, gazing off southward. A solitary rake, leaning askew on an old yew, old as you. Perched precariously between the branches it lay and lied and lies. Lies, sharp lies, white lies, bitter lies. How can you not know, rake? How can you?
It began that day in mid-autumn, a lonely thing, leaning and leaning so far she could drop and fall forever and nobody would notice. The swirling colours blinded and dazzled, a reflection of the times to come. Broken, unwanted.
Dust in the wind.
I never wanted her. Sitting cozy at home, wending the shores of the 24 Hours, through distant rains I crossed and checked. 3-Across: Groundbreaking innovation? Womanizer.
Then she started to fall.
Nature has no feelings. Nature does not see our sights, does not breathe our air, does not walk the stairs and talk the bears and balk at rares. In the mass of spinning leaves, my eyes reverting from the south, dropt.
The ground, incarnadine, as she dropt, all purpose-like, as if her destiny were to destroy and destruct and detonate. As she fell and flew and shattered all around her.
The rake, you mowed someone.
You know that really cool guy you want to be when you grow up? The guy with the hair and the teeth and the lips? The guy who does all those things you’d expect really cool guys to do, and more?
Well, I think I’ve met my future.
Nadie espera a la Inquisición española. And nobody expects the Spanish Inquisition to represent the Spanish Inquisition, either. Sure, they’re not actually Spanish, and they’re not actually inquiring into anything, but that’s alright…
Blood-saturated cholesterol is the topic for this week’s conversation. Everybody understands the need to stay fit, and being an exemplar of proper eating habits, Miki-T understands this more than all. As a strict vegan, she espouses the frequent consumption of beans and other fart-inducing vegetables. As the ancient Chinese proverb goes, “Blood-saturated cholesterol is like mud-desecrated express patrols.”
冒什么 is also an ancient Chinese proverb. Literally, it transliterates to “To risk your life for the sake of retrieving a hat questions your questionable nature with questions.” Emilia risks her life when she DARES to be FAIR and to WEAR shoes that FARE quite IMPAIRED towards STAIRS. Even though the stairs keep on happening, she still trips because of guilt, fields, and acid; her new human body is weak, having seemingly forgotten all of her previous mental and physical training.
On a serious note, the whole earthquake thing was handled quite tactfully. Although I don’t have tact (people who unfollowed me on twitter know this), I somehow survive with my reputation INTACT, even if I ATTACKED the Family COMPACT.
Who really is Lucifer? Well, ask yourselves: who broke the Family Compact? That’s right… Lucifer isn’t whom you’re thinking of. In fact, the person who broke the Family Compact probably isn’t whom you’re thinking of either, because honestly, who cares? Either way, Lucifer symbolically represents the return of Louis Riel. One can REVEAL this secret UNREAL by hearing a SPIEL from MushyRIELZ:
Both Lucifer and Louis start with the same letter.
tl;dr: The reason Emilia is so manly is because her GAR dad had sex with an angel. Shit, dawg.
P.S. The condom on Emilia forehead represents a condom on Emilia’s forehead.
The pun is because 帽 sounds like ‘Maou’ and means ‘Hat’ in Chinese. Granted it’s not a terribly good pun, but the quality of my puns is proportional to the quality of the episode being covered; that is to say, this episode wasn’t terribly. I was terribly.
The connections this week were as deep as ever. For example, ‘Sadao’ is almost a palindrome but not quite. If it were a palindrome, it would probably become ‘Soadaos’, but Japanese people would spontaneously combust at the sight of such a monstrosity. Thus, a compromise is ‘Sadas’; however, the unfortunate comparison of Sadas to Sad-ass is quite unfortunate indeed.
Sa~tan’s transformation to super-buffness shows off the intense flexibility of non-UNISLO
clothing slothing. Notice how the only rips occur at his neck and shin. This shows UNISLOthing’s Achilles’ heels: they are at disadvantages to necks and shins, and are thus con-neck-shin.
Further connections occur when we closely analyze the various character archetypes that appear:
- Chi-chan represents annoying brats meant only for neckbeard fanservice;
- Chi-chan’s hygienic activities while on the couch represents the squalid state of Japan’s aging toothpaste industry;
- Emi’s initial shower scene represents
annoying tsundere antics meant only for neckbeard fanserviceuh, the artificial ravaging of traditional Aboriginal society by uncompromising Eurocentric social conformance;
- The bad jokes represent bad jokes;
- Wait, no, Chi-chan is an annoying brat meant only for neckbeard fanservice.
I thought the whole earthquake plot device was kinda too early, right after the nuclear plants and the recent one in China, but maybe they actually already delayed the airing of this anime (to now)… it’s also y’know the STUPIDEST POSSIBLE WAY to move a plot forward. The author probably wrote two chapters and then retconned it to add miscellaneous random earthquakes after realizing how profoundly stupid earthquakes suddenly coming out of thin air was. Really, the tone of 帽-sama is like the difference between the inside of a 帽 and the outside; one is inside the 帽 and one is outside it.
tl;dr: Japan has horrible earthquake protection training. All of those tables and everybody just stays standing like stranded stands on a strand of standings
Everybody hates racks. I hate racks. I rack hats. Iran hats are alright but when it’s summer and the heat gets to your brain, sometimes, you have to settle for less.
Settling for less is the most recent lesser unsettling theme in Part-Time Job Work Lord King Demon.
We all remember the Indian Act, 1876’s effects on Canada, right? Well, that doesn’t actually matter because Ente Isla isn’t Canada and Sa~tan isn’t an Indian. No sir, he’s merely a representation of an
Indian native American, excuse me. So who is Emilia?
Emilia, like Sa~tan, is an outcast. Thrust into conforming to society’s inflexible norms, her mutual ‘alliance’ with Sa~ represents the INDIAN CONFEDERACY and their mutual support in the face of the White Man’s encroachment. Eventually, they failed because they were already croached, and as everyone knows, once croached, always encroached.
What is cultural assimilation? It’s a concept that many people intimately don’t give a toss about, and neither should you. Unfortunately, you’re dealing with Hataraku Maou-sama! (literal translation: ‘Demon Lord-customers work!), one of the most profoundly insightful, cultured, and reflective Chinese cartoons of April 2013.
The main character, Sa-tan (-tan is a endearing suffix in Japanese, and to pursue O-New’s policy of conservative liberalization, shall be henceforth redacted to -y, a corresponding English endearing suffix), is a stranger in a strange land. Say says yes to strangers’ strange sayings in strangeland.
To observe his gradual assimilation into strangeculture, we have three useful metrics:
1) The amount of strangespeech Say says;
2) The amount of strangegovernmentsupport Say receives;
3) And the amount of strangefood Say eats.
Obviously, Say has been completely
Americanized I mean Eurocentrized uh Japanesified ASSIMILATED. This assimilation makes Say’s ass similar to other nations’ asses.
It’s not where you come from.
It’s not where you’re at.
It’s where you’re going
and I am going home.
–A friend of mine
We left Tamako on the precipice. Would she jump? Should she?
There comes a moment in a strong relationship where you must decide whether it is time to say goodbye. This could be before the relationship starts, at that scary time when you’re not quite sure if it’s real. It could be just before the end, when you are afraid of loss and irrationally want to cut your losses. It could be in between in a fit of jealousy or self-doubt. No matter, it is nearly inevitable. That’s the impetus of Tamako Market episode 11.
Tamako Market is really a wonderful show. Each episode captures something so beautifully that I’m in love with life by the end. Often, as is the case with episode 9, what it captures is nostalgia.
Do you remember your first love?
Hello friends. It’s time again for our first impressions of the new season of anime. Today I will be giving my impressions, because the other O-New writers are either busy not watching anime, or not writing for O-New. I hope I can meet your expectations myself. (more…)
Maoyuu’s entire selling point is ~economics with boobs~.
Add maids into the mix and everyone’s happy.
Except, no, not really. Do maids have any significance in the situation’s context? They’re a good comparison of modern employment vs. serfdom but no, not really. Take away the maids and nothing’s left out. The maids are an accessory: nobody dislikes them, but they’re practically useless.
Similarly, all the fanservice around Maou is practically useless. Fanservice not being all ~boobs~, but also her moé attitudes towards Yuusha. Did we need that hour-long sofa scene? No. Did we need that hilariously dull body-pillow scene? No.
But they’re aesthetically pleasing. They’re the spoonful of sugar that makes the medicine go down, and the medicine is ~economix~.
Maoyuu is just a glorified economics textbook. This isn’t rocket science. Someone (can’t remember who, tell me if you remember) once said: “Spice and Wolf is about characters, with some random economics thrown in. Maoyuu is about economics, with some random characters thrown in.”
Like a textbook, the author wraps Maoyuu in bright pictures and colourful ‘real-world’ examples that drive up production costs a thousandfold. Like a textbook, Maoyuu is just a lecture transposed into another medium. Like a textbook, Maoyuu also suffers from masterful pacing: serf girl mutters, sotto voce, “You’ve never been starving, have you?” Cut to comedy music. Let’s imply that starving serfs is totally a joke! Yeah! (That said, who would want to starve half-servile labour? That’s a recipe to losing money, fast…)
Unlike a textbook, we’re not in an economics class. We don’t need to learn this. Is Maoyuu actually doing a public service? Is Maoyuu an educational anime?
Yes, yes to both. Sure, it’s patronizing 1984-ish (actually manipulating the war so that ending it will be easier?) ~COMMUNISM~ crap, but short of Moshidora, the edutainment doesn’t get much more obvious.
Maoyuu is an educational anime through and through. Nothing else.
[MUSHYHIJACK: I have rescheduled this post to clear January 13th – February 15th of any posts. The original posting date was January 25th.]
Imagine for a moment that the simple things in life become the most difficult. Everything is turned upside down. What if it were easier to be cold and distant than to be warm and friendly? What if saying “thank you” felt unnatural and impossible?
I can’t tell whether this is mocking traditional shounen tests or what because why the hell do you need a test to enter a dormi-oh right she’s insane. and moe. the simpsons moe.
Having him enter a student dorm is about the laziest way to introduce more quirky characters (cause everybody else is normal/rich and rich people aren’t fun to be around) ever. The only thing worse is if some autismal savant came into the picture and trust me that was baaaaaaaaaaaddd. d d d. d.
It’s also a convenient way to shape Megumi into becoming a childhood-friend-type, but she should have friends after three years in middle school, compared to Souma, whom nobody likes. Or licks.
if god is omnipresent then
P.S. I didn’t need to see that pirate picture at the end. Nor the granny flashback. At least the metaphor was a flashback and not… what it usually is ._.
P.P.S. There was relatively less fanservice here than before. I guess the shower scene was supposed to be humorous at first but now, I really don’t understand why anybody would add one except because it’s such an ingrained anime icon. It’s really just pervasive and customary toilet humour.
P.P.P.S. Souma is secretly a GT Robo. his only energy source is the souls of dead squids. when he bleeds he bleeds black ink
tl;dr: I’m going to post 12 posts today.
As most of you know, O-New prides ourselves on having posted once every day for the past two-and-a-bit years. Needless to say, this is all a silly ruse. All two hundred and twenty-five of those posts were published posthumously; that is to say, I edited the publishing date so it merely /looked/ like we posted once every day for the past two-and-a-bit years.
“What’s the difference between posting extra posts in the past and scheduling them for the future?” nobody will ask their monitors. To put it simply: procrastination. We actually have a tag for my scheduled posts (nobody else’s, cause redball & co. regularly schedule their posts). There are only 37.
Unfortunately, all those were lies too. Even rewriting history wasn’t enough. We still have
2 empty days in 2010, 13 empty days in 2011, and…
93 empty days in 2012.
What a way to start off the new year! The symbolism behind rewriting a ST&RS post for New Year’s is that at O-New, the new year’s going to bring upon us the same fate as ST&RS: a slow, painful death from neglect, disinterest, and creative stagnation!
Here’s a picture of Shirafune farting.
The timeline is still really strange in Steins;Gate. How can Rintarou get the IBN5100 if he’s already met Suzuha? Think about it:
1975: nothing happens
2010a: Rintarou doesn’t have the IBN5100
2010b: nothing happens
2012: SERN takes over world
2038: Suzuha goes to 2010b, creating Timeline 2
20XX: world at peace
1975: nothing happens
2010a: Rintarou doesn’t have the IBN5100
2010b: Suzuha goes to 1975, creating Timeline 3
2012: SERN takes over world
2038: Suzuha goes to 2010b, creating Timeline 4 (which is the same as Timeline 2)
1975: Suzuha gets the IBN5100
2010a: Rintarou has the IBN5100
2010b: nothing happens
2012: nothing happens
2038: nothing happens
20XX: world is free
The key point is that when Suzuha goes back to the past in 2010b and in 2038, her two travels make two different timelines. The line that would lead to their success is created when she travels back to 1975. There’s no reason why her travel back to 2010b takes her to the same timeline. Then again, a story about Timeline 3 would be as boring as watching paint grow on a grassy wall, so it’s forgiven.
P.S. What is Reading Steiner? If anybody stuck their memories in the time machine, they would be able to retain their memories through world lines—because it’s not their bodies travelling through time, it’s the information. If, say, Mayuri used the time machine to implant Rintarou’s future memories into herself, she’d not only travel through time, but would inherit a different identity! That would’ve been an interesting device for, say, Kokoro Connect…