O-New: Now Extinct Website

Posts tagged “Anime Completed

Mouretsu Pirates 26 [Completed]

And it ends.

I was about to post a 4000-word essay about Marika’s callous disregard of ancient Sea of the Morningstar culture, or about the failings of electronics and androids in a post-FTL-drive universe, or about the political drive for mercenary coalitions to protect Marika’s Letter of Marque, or about the inherent hypocrisy and ironic stupidity in Mouretsu Pirates’s anime execution, and then I realized…

..since this is the last episode, this is my last chance to talk about Mouretsu Pirates.

So why not talk about everything? No, that doesn’t mean I’ll post a 16000-word post (read my winter anime previews for a 12000-word post). Instead… what about a story?

It was a dark and stormy night. Unnamed-director-of-More-Sue-Pirates-who-is-most-definitely-not-Sato-Tatsuo-because-Sato-Tatsuo-directed-Mouretsu-Pirates, who shall hereafter be referred to as ‘Mackenzie Ulysses Svetlana Harjot Zdrojkowski’ to conserve space, lay dead at his desk. The television set behind him flickered feebly, rings of static fuzzing the display as a shrill voice cried imperceptibly the onset of the fourteenth episode of Mouretsu Pirates:

“It’s time for some piracy!”

The assassin looked over his work, but thought it ill-advised to continue deliberation. Shoving his fat ass through the open window, he sneaked off noisily in the night. In his sneakers.

Barbaloosa
The joke is that Barbaloosa is a loser. Then I realized that wasn’t much of a joke but I couldn’t be arsed to re-rewatch the episode. This caption has been expertly placed as stark contrast to the preceding paragraph.

Your mom’s a mooser»


Black★Rock Shooter (TV) 8 [Completed]

Mad props to the team over at WhyNot? for subbing this shit all the way until the end. Hmmm, they sub Mouretsu Pirates too, this can’t be a coincidence… ;)

Observe this post, it’s a Black★Rock Shooter (TV) 7 post. I just wrote it today because I forgot to watch this show until today, and was rather rushed because I had to watch two episodes and write these two posts in the span of a mere three hours (it usually takes me three hours just to write ONE post!)

Anyways, this episode JUST came out, like literally (check that link) so don’t mind me if this post feels rushed. Here, have a picture of noitaminA while you wait. Here, more noitaminA comparison – doesn’t Black★Rock Shooter (TV)’s ED sound a lot like Guilty Crown’s first ED? Why yes it does – this can’t be a coincidence either… ;(

No, he’s the miner»


Steins;Gate: Oukoubakko no Poriomania [Completed]

So, as my first actual post as a guest poster, I’m going to write about a particular episode of Steins;Gate that not too many people would care about. Why? Because it’s a test to see if I can write about anything decently, as I don’t know if I can.

I’m actually almost certain that I’m a guest poster here for the sole purpose of Mushy DISMANTLING MY POST AND CRUSHING MY DREAMS WHILST PUBLICLY HUMILIATING ME EVERY TIME I WRITE A SINGLE WORD, but w/e.


The gist of this episode

THIS IS FOUR DAYS LATE»


Kyoukai Senjou no Horizon 13 [Completed]

So, I was up all night (that is to say, until 9:00) doing my science project (that is to say, watching random anime that aired two months ago). Thus, this post is late, tardy, belated, unpunctual, delayed, not on time, etc.

There’s no ‘we’ in ‘O-New’»


Ore no Imouto ga Konnani Kawaii Wake ga Nai Animated Commentary 15 [Completed]

Kirino: “HEY GUYS THIS ANIME SUCKS!”

“HEY GUYS THIS COMMENTARY ALSO SUCKS!”»


Ben-To 12 [Completed]


“So who’s looking after you, You?”

I was just chillin’ around with my bro,
Took the whole day and so there’s no post,
It may not be on time,
But at least it has rhymes,
A nice end to this ridiculous show.
But now it’s over, the end of Ben-To.

I am the maverick of limericks»


Maji de Watashi ni Koi Shinasai! 12 [Completed]

Perhaps ‘Maji de Watashi ni Koi Shinasai!’ is too lengthy a designation for a show of such length. Perhaps, it is ‘tl;dw’ – ‘terribly lengthy; [a] disaster [to] write’, or ‘tiredly laborious; describe [it to me without] words’? Thankfully, I, the great master of simplicity, shortening, and pastries, have just the innovative solution you need to cure yourself from ‘the laziness [of] death wishes’!

Is ‘Maji de Watashi ni Koi Shinasai!’ a disaster to write? Write no more, for we shall relieve you of your upper limbs in some time [if] at all! In the rare occurrence that our timely services are insufficient, we have exercised our great mental capabilities to manufacture a shorter, more efficient, and unique acronym for ‘Maji de Watashi ni Koi Shinasai!’ Instead of numerous other ineffectual abbreviations such as ‘Majikoi’, ‘Denisai’, or ‘Mawakoshi’, simply write ‘cqX7’ in place of ‘Maji de Watashi ni Koi Shinasai!’ Instead of typing all thirty-two characters, you need only express four.

Was that not what you were looking for? Were you hoping I to describe cqX7 without words, for watching cqX7 was tiredly laborious? You must be a senile old fool to tire from such a terse expedition. Nevertheless, O-New values every single or married senile old fool that visits our senile, old, foolish site. Worry not, senile old fools! Behold! A picture suffices for more than nine hundred and eighty-two words:

cqX7 stands for ‘cats quietly xylophone 72’»