Mouretsu Pirates 22
You’ve seen me moping about being sick the past few days. Actually, hopefully you haven’t, because this post was actually published on June 7th, 2012 and totally not June 18th because why would I publish a post that’s already been published?? It doesn’t make any logical sense! :o
Anyways, hopefully, you haven’t seen me moping about being sick the past few days. This is because I did not go to school the past few days, and if you saw me, it would be within the confines of my own home. And that’s creepy regardless if you’re a family member or not, for if you are, this blog is creepy, and if you aren’t, you are creepy. Stalkers. (psssssst click the link to understand this ~inside joke~ that’s not even a joke)
Regardless of whether you have or haven’t seen me moping about being sick or not the past few days, there is no doubt that Show is undoubtedly and indubitably radical sick
I’m heading off to Seattle again. Expect pictures when I return. Until then, az will run the show!! Have fun. Here’s a picture of my face, sighing because I’m sick. Of you.
Have some much needed backstory, in one paragraph.
Students’ Strike! (With More Points Than a Students’ Spare)
I guess these students can really SPARE some time to STRIKE, because that’s what they’re doing in this stereotypical rainy Vancouver afternoon.
Want to know what I’m talking about? CBC has an article here. Really, just search up ‘British Columbia student walkout’ and you’ll find hundreds of articles on it. However, after my five minutes of sleuthing, CBC’s article seems to be the most unbiased.
As a student in the BC public school system that has witnessed th-oh fuck I can’t type formally, here, let’s inject some much-needed CAPITALISM
I am a STUDENT in BC. Many of my fellow students WALKED OUT of school TODAY at 2:00, two hours before THIS POST was posted. Unfortunately, I did not, even though I just sat around and did NOTHING in my final block, and I would’ve been more productive SKIPPING school and WRITING this post at HOME instead. However, I did not SKIP school, and neither did I go to the PROTEST.
Because I’ve done my RESEARCH, and I don’t BELIEVE in this protest.
What is the protest saying?
The ORGANIZERS say it’s to encourage mutual RESPECT between the government and the TEACHERS. Yet, that’s not what the STUDENTS are thinking. They’re thinking that it’s to promote EDUCATION by paying teachers MORE and easing class composition ISSUES. That’s not the point of THIS protest; that’s the point of the TEACHERS’ protest.
We’re already PAST the point of bargaining. Teachers are striking to make a POINT, not because they actually BELIEVE that the government will give them a pay raise this year. No, everybody (except the STUDENTS) know that the strike is going to FADE AWAY, the BCTF’s going to accept NET-ZERO, and not even government’s Bill 22 (which will STRIP teachers of their RIGHT to STRIKE) will pass. In effect, it’ll end in an IMPASSE, with both parties WARILY agreeing to a contract that NOBODY WANTS.
And nothing can change this, anymore. Not even a PROTEST. My English teacher once said that protesting is useless; the important part is creating a SOLUTION. Yet, currently, she’s PROTESTING, and her solution? “Give us more money!”
Towards the actual issue, I’m AMBIVALENT. Both sides have COHERENT arguments and UNDERSTANDABLE reasons for what they’re doing. Yet, neither side is willing to RESPECT the other side. I cannot approve of EITHER. You guys know I’m telling the truth, because I always tell the truth on O-New. Besides, we’re a pretty OPINIONATED blog, and we’re NOT AFRAID to show that we HATE J.C. STAFF, a position that has alienated me from FLARE, that other blogger on O-New who never blogs. So, we have no reason to HIDE our opinions, and when we SAY we’re neutral, we MEAN that I’m neutral. Yes, I’m too lazy to replace all the ‘we’s in those sentences with ‘I’s. Maybe you can help me do that, and be my ears and ‘I’s. Ha ha ha.
At least, the teachers, by striking for three days from Monday to Wednesday, leave me with an effective five-day-weekend, extending my science fair project (which was originally due Monday) that I haven’t started’s deadline by five days. Furthermore, after a final Thursday and Friday of school next week, it’ll be a two-week-long Spring Break… =3=
In summary: I don’t have a better POST to POST today. This alliteration should sum things up pretty CONCISELY:
Currently, crazy Canadian countrymen cannot co-operatively compromise.
Black★Rock Shooter (TV) 4
GOD my FUCKING GOD fuck YOU ALL OF YOU my GOD just FUCK FUCK FUCK. If you want to FUCKING SKIP these FUCKING EXPLETIVES you better SCROLL DOWN TO THE BOTTOM OF THE PAGE where I will SUMMARIZE everything that I will SWEAR this episode
Remember my FUCKING LAST POST?! Well, guess what just HAPPENED to FUCK? You see, I, being a significant, important, and influential personage of the anime industry, had received exclusive access to the pre-air of the next episode of Black★Rock Shooter (TV) – episode three – four days before it aired to the general public. BUT FOR SOME STRANGE REASON, my EXCLUSIVE ACCESS had been STRANGELY REMOVED!!! This is a SEVERE ATROCITY and I demand to RECTIFY this situation IMMEDIATELY by writing on a BLOG that NOBODY READS about the next episode of Black★Rock Shooter (TV) – episode four – two days after it aired to the general public, because by doing this, I will most definitely recover my EXLUSIVELY REVOKED access to the pre-air of Black Rock whatEVER just like my face is like THIS. Madoka. Just…. just… stop it. Here, Madoka can act like this (warning: danbo) for all I care. Because HERE IS MY FACE. Currently.
ARGH. I’ve had ENOUGH of this SILLY LOG. *kicks tree away with sharp part of foot*
Busou Chuugakusei: Basket Army 1
Y’know, the kind of première episodes I hate the most are those that exist only to introduce the characters (see: Horizon). What kind of posts can you make out of those, other than posts that exist only to introduce the characters (see: Horizon)?
I guess my creativity was sucked out of me by octopuses or something, because I can’t think of any creative things to do than to recap a five-minute-long episode in a post that’ll take you more than five minutes to read. Here’s a guy’s eyebrow. I think it’s the most interesting thing that’s happened this episode.
Mouretsu Pirates 1 [Impressions]
I don’t think you guys understand what ‘Mouretsu Pirates’ means.
It means, ‘more sue pirates’.
Which is what’s happening.
Pirates are being sued more.
2012 Winter Anime Part Three
So, what did I learn from writing season previews?
Rule 1 of writing season previews: Don’t write season previews after everybody else does.
Rule 2 of writing season previews: Do not write season previews after the previous season has already ended.
Rule 3 of writing season previews: DO NOT write season previews after the season’s shows have already started.
Rule 4 of writing season previews: DO NOT WRITE SEASON PREVIEWS after all the season’s shows have already started.
Rule 5 of writing season previews: DO NOT WRITE SEASON PREVIEWS AFTER THE SEASON IS OVER!
Rule 6 of writing season previews: Do not talk about writing season previews»
GBA: Great Begger Anastasius
Sorry guys; still working on my preview, so here’s a short post for today.
AND THAT’S RIGHT it’s time for yet another episode of STUPIDEAS, where stupid ideas come to die!
Today, our newest idea is courtesy of ME, the great MUSHYRULEZ, who is also your MC, your host, your broadcaster, your journalist, and not at all your friend. At all. Unless you write a post. gosh darn it houraiguy
Once upon a time, there was a boy. He was a young boy, as all young boys and normal boys were – young. But suddenly, he dropped out of high school and he was not so young and boyish anymore. In fact, he was an old, twenty-year-old man. His name was…
He had no job because he dropped out of high school and nobody wanted anybody who didn’t even have a master’s degree. He had no money because he accidentally threw all his money to homeless people, and he didn’t believe in bank accounts and debit cards. He had no kids because he had no wife, and he had no wife because he had no girlfriend, and he had no girlfriend because he had no life, and he had no life because he dropped out of high school. Nobody knows why he dropped out of high school, perhaps he’ll die.
Kyoukai Senjou no Horizon 13 [Completed]
So, I was up all night (that is to say, until 9:00) doing my science project (that is to say, watching random anime that aired two months ago). Thus, this post is late, tardy, belated, unpunctual, delayed, not on time, etc.
Kyoukai Senjou no Horizon 12
Continuing my spree of rewriting history (it rhymes just like a tree that recently learned to speak), I have written a post on Flying Witch, a manga oneshot. This would’ve been a simple link if the post were a simple post, but NOPE – the post is not actually about a manga oneshot, and nor is it about flying witches! Care to find out more? Then read the post, and give me DOUBLE the traffic I usually get today, even though 93% of the traffic I get on any given day is from people searching pedo bear, pedo bär, or pedo baer.
What I’m trying to say, is:
Kyoukai Senjou no Horizon 8
For a REFRESHING change in POSTING STYLE, I shall separate this post into THREE HALVES – that is to say, this post will be ONE AND A HALF times longer than it usually is, as there are THREE HALVES in this post. Ha. Ha. Half.
Half 1: Have a Hassle
I just personally insulted an Onew (the singer-guy who is stealing every single search result for ‘O-New’) fan prawpr with speiling cannadan gramer and. I’m not actually sure how I did it, but I /think/ it went something like this:
[Onew fan follows me. She has two hundred tweets, fifty followers, and is following one thousand people.]
Onew fan: “Hello. I am a half-Japanese female who has recently immigrated to Britain, and am also a SHINee [Onew’s band name] fan. Would you please follow me back? I would appreciate the extra attention.”
Me: “are u a onew fan to”
Onew fan: “Yes, I am. I particularly enjoy his music. Are you also a fan of Korean pop music?”
Me: “no i hate all onew fans”
Onew fan: “Well, simply because you hate all Onew fans does not mean that you must be mean to all of them. You cannot say such vile words.”
Me: “im ‘murican kay i’ve fredom of speech. also i sugest u talk in propre english, if u keep talking like that ur english will becum relleh bad. juts for praktise you no cause u just come to britan rite”
Onew fan: “Do not tell me what I can or I cannot say! You are not my mother.”
Me: “well y r u folowing me anyway”
[Onew fan blocks me.]
Kyoukai Senjou no Horizon 5
Look at how sad it is…
Then again, if you got stabbed in the head with a spear, you’d also be pretty sad.
2011 Fall Anime First Impressions
This is what I expected when I came into the season.
Yes, I expected JINGLE BELLS SINGLE HELL SINGLE ALL THE WAY»
Kyoukai Senjou no Horizon 4
[Announcement #1: So, here are some NEW TAGS because I decided that having tags for LAME RHYMES in my Ben-To posts, RANDOM CAPITALIZATION in my Horizon posts, and EXCELLENT GRAMMAR in my Majikoi posts was somehow a GOOD IDEA, and have come up with the intuitive names CAPITALISM GO!, It’s TIME to RHYME, and Needlessly Serious, because those are NICE TAG TITLES. You’ll notice that ALL OF MY TAGS have EXTRAORDINARILY CREATIVE names, such as ‘Anime’, ‘Animanga’, ‘Anime Post’ and ‘Kyoukai Senjou no Horizon’. Nobody could have put it better. I didn’t go through the archives to re-tag non-Ben-To/Horizon/Majikoi posts with the tags because I am lazy and should make a tag for that. OH WAIT, I ALREADY HAVE]
[Announcement #2: Guess what? DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME ENDED, which means it’s TIME to
rhyme change our watches back an hour…. IF YOUR WATCH WASN’T SET ON GMT LIKE MINE IS. HA HA HA. I DON’T EVEN NEED TO ADJUST MY WATCH (although now my brain will be confused for six months as I get used to adding four hours instead of five, and adjust to the new time format just as Daylight Savings begins again). Anyways, that’s the reason this post was so late. Originally I was just watching Fate/Zero (awesome show, btw) but realized it was 4:00 and decided to start watching Horizon to make this post on time for publishing at 5:00… BUT THE DUE TIME WAS 4:00, SO I WAS ALREADY LATE. And then I realized it took a lot more time to write a Horizon post than I originally suspected so what can do ┐(‘～`；)┌
[Announcement #3: ENOUGH WITH THE TAGS LET’S GET ON WITH THE CAPITALISM]
Kyoukai Senjou no Horizon 3
[Announcement: IT’S A PALINDROME DATE TODAY because it’s 2011/11/02 which is TWO OH ONE ONE | ONE ONE OH TWO, or 11/02/2011 which is ONE ONE OH TWO | TWO OH ONE ONE which is ALSO A PALINDROME!
I EVEN HAVE A TAG for this!]
Kyoukai Senjou no Horizon 2
O-NEW is not an animoe blob! Nor an Annie Blog.
Kyoukai Senjou no Horizon 1 [Impressions]
Man, I got better Internet. instead of downloading at a hundred kilobytes per second, now it’s downloading at over a megabyte per second (Speedtest.net says mine is at almost three megabytes per second). So, I downloaded Episode 2 of KYOUKAISENJOUNOHORIZON in SIX MINUTES. What’s the point of downloading an episode in six minutes when it takes twenty to watch the show?! I’m better than 86% of people in terms of download speed, but I’m worse than 99% of people in terms of anime-watching speed. It took me two hours just to watch this episode (with screenshots, blobs, notes, etc.) and another
one three hours just to write this post (five in total)!
Expect no more half season reviews until I’m totally caught up with these three (Horizon, Ben-To, Majikoi) episodics – Shoka was my last currently following show of last season, as I’m not currently following Penguindrum and Kamisama no Memochou/Dolls.
Uhhh tl;dr, let’s begin (over 3000 words, be warned).
The IDIOT, the CHESS, and the SUMMONED BEAN
(Alternative Title: STUPID ANIME IDEAS II: THE SEQUEL)
So one day, there’s this guy. He’s an idiot. Like he’s really stupid and doesn’t do anything well. He only has one ‘hidden strength’, which is his ability to garden. But that’s all, he doesn’t even know what the plants he plants are called or how to eat them, but he is able to magically plant REALLY STRONG PLANTS.
Anyways, on the last day of elementary school, he finds a BEAN on the street. Being the gardener that he is, he plants it.
After a year, the BEAN PLANT has grew into a BEAN PLANT. He HARVESTS the beans and, being stupid, eats one.
SUDDENLY, HE BECOMES SUPER SMART. He realizes that this bean will make him smarter, and selfishly decides to hide it so that nobody else can eat the beans. Thus, he kills the bean plant and stores all its beans in a box.
HOWEVER, after an hour, he suddenly is an idiot again, and promptly forgets what the heck happened, continuing to garden and shit.
Now, like ANOTHER YEAR LATER, his CHILDHOOD FRIEND forces him to join the school’s CHESS CLUB, which is in desperate need of members cause chess is a stupid game and only stupid people play it. Our main character, being an idiot, starts playing chess, which is all fine and well as only stupid people play it.
There are like three other members of the club, and one person’s like a SUPER SMART COOL GUY, and another person’s like A STUDIOUS INDIVIDUAL (i.e. a nerd who is not cool and wears huge glasses), and another person’s like A GANGSTER GUY who plays chess because of HIS DARK PAST. Anyways they don’t matter cause you can change their personalities whenever
They practice chess and quickly find out that our main character is an IDIOT, but they go to a team chess competition the next day anyways. It’s a 5 on 5 tournament with each person facing another person in two rounds of chess, and our main character is the last one to play. He loses both matches to his opponent, but because his team’s so good, the final score is still 5 – 5, so a tiebreaker game must be played… by him.
He finds a BEAN in his pocket (somehow), and being extremely hungry and an idiot, eats it.
SUDDENLY, HE’S SUPER SMART and he easily decimates his opponent, letting the team advance to the next round.
His childhood friend briefs him on what happened, and he realizes that he only has, I don’t know, 60 beans left, and each of them only last an hour. Finding that he’s actually has a passion in chess, he devotes much of his time to studying chess.
Eventually, three years later, it is the WORLD NATIONAL INTERNATIONAL CHILDRENS’ YOUTHS’ TEENAGERS’ HIGHSCHOOLERS’ CHESS COMPETITION TOURNAMENT MATCH! He uses up almost all of his beans to beat their opponents in each round until the last round, where he only has three beans left. However, his opponent takes a lot of time for each move, and although he draws one round, he ate all of his beans to get that draw.
So, without beans, he must use his OWN BRAIN POWER on the final match. However, he realizes that HE’S ACTUALLY REALLY GOOD AT CHESS NOW, but still can’t beat his opponent, who takes a lot of time and plays extremely solidly and traditionally, sticking to Classical strategies.
As the tables turn away from his favour, our main character starts to panic, but because of THE POWER OF FRIENDSHIP he KEEPS HIS COOL.
Finally, just as he’s seemingly about to lose with his opponent unleashing an UNSTOPPABLE CHECKMATE, he throws ALL OF HIS PIECES at the enemy king, and wins the game with a completely unexpected CASTLE, which CHECKMATES the enemy.
As he is crowned the WORLD NATIONAL INTERNATIONAL CHILDRENS’ YOUTHS’ TEENAGERS’ HIGHSCHOOLERS’ CHESS COMPETITION TOURNAMENT CHAMPION WINNER NUMBER ONE MASTER VICTOR, he realizes…
…he’s still an idiot.
So after reading BakaTest 16 with Kirishima doing all that, I just got a great idea for a new hit shounen manga: MARITAL ARTISTS.
So these MARITAL ARTISTS are like MARTIAL ARTISTS except they MARRY PEOPLE. And first it starts off with the main character being like a priest or something, but when suddenly an evil person CRASHES this wedding, the priest realizes that he has to SAVE THE DAY, and he uses his KON FU powers to defeat the MARRIAGE CRASHER.
And then after a lot of incidents like that he meets another MARITAL ARTIST who introduces him to the land of marital art, and they do epic battles and shit. Eventually the protagonist will become the world’s best marital artist so that every single rich person in the world wants to be married by him, and people are getting divorced so they can get married by him again. And then MARITAL ARTISTS COME FROM MARS and the protagonist has to battle them with like BIBLES and HOLY WATER and WEDDING CAKES and yeah.
Also, because all good manga must have memorable secondary characters, the main guy will have like this archrival marital artist who tries to become a better marital artist but always fails, and this helper-marriage-person who helps marry people by like organizing the wedding and all that. And then there’s going to be this professional lawyer guy who knows about law and looks really cool who does all the law stuff and when the MARTIAN MARITAL ARTISTS come he like hits them with law textbooks and screams OBJECTION at their faces LIKE A BOSS. Of course there’s also going to be this evil marital artist who marries people against their will for money, but eventually when the martians come he’s going to be good and marry people for good too.
This isn’t actually going to happen… or will it?!
P.S. @Glo and Nyarth, Sukunai is the funniest shit I’ve read since Beelzebub, which is like only 1.5x better.