Yes, I know. The pun doesn’t even make sense, because y’know, it’s actually May 6th right now and I’m lying to you guys about this post date. But guess what, O-New TRANSCENDS time and space, and I can post bad puns ANYWHERE, ANYTIME I want to. DEAL WITH IT
In this post which is not about anime nor manga and is instead about the life of the most boring person to ever walk the earth, I will talk about:
- May the Fourth
- How I’ve Only Watched the First Episode of Star Wars
- Dropbox Contests
- Cinco de Mayo
- Birthday Presents
- How I’m Not a Nerd Because I Don’t Play Video Games
- How I Learned to Love the Aniblog Tourney
- Flower Pictures
- Your Face
- Outdoor Track Meets
- Your Mother’s Face
Rest assured, I will touch upon every single one of those topics, and in that order!!
Yes, I will also touch your mother’s face»
(Alternate Title: Staking Chances on a Competition of Senseless Animation Vituperations, Organized by a Naïvely Egotistical Writer, Part Two)
(Alternative Title: Wow, Look at This Super Cool Temporary Theme I Will Be Using for the Duration of this Tournament Because Otherwise, I’d Lose to Otou-san & Co. Near-Instantly)
I chose not to go with the alternate title since a) ANIBLOG BETTING literally screams at you and I would literally scream at you in real life b) the alternate title is too long c) I already have a post called that d) ANIBLOG BETTING just sounds cooler. Also, ANIBLOG BETTING could be an acronym for ‘A Nice Italian Bakery Loses Our Gold, Because Eating Their Taiyaki Is Not Gratifying’. Sure that doesn’t have anything to do with ANIBLOG BETTING but it DOES, because ‘A Nice Italian Bakery Loses Our Gold, Because Eating Their Taiyaki Is Not Gratifying’ can be shortened to ANIBLOG BETTING.
BUT WAIT! Surely there must be some reward for winning this that isn’t just pride. And indeed there is! The first place winner will receive the chance to write one (1) COMPLETELY UNEDITED post on O-New, a post that I won’t even read before publishing. In it, you can write ANYTHING YOU WANT, embed ANYTHING YOU WANT (as long as it’s not hardcore porn), and generally yeah, do whatever you want. You can talk about how Mushyrulez really sucks. You can write about that super cool hentai anime you just watched (but take notice: O-New is currently a child-friendly blog!). You can show us just how horrible this entire idea is.
BUT WAIT! That’s not all! Do I sound like an annoying TV advertiser yet? If yes, GREAT because that’s who I’m going to be. The first place winner will ALSO receive a FREE O-REW, free of charge. Completely free. Not like there are such things as paid O-REWs, anyways.
BUT WAIT! That’s not all! You will also receive a complimentary DRAWING of ANYTHING YOU WANT (but take notice: if you tell me to draw porn, I’ll draw prawn instead)! The second place winner will receive an O-REW and a complimentary drawing, and the third place winner will receive either an O-REW or a complimentary drawing. Of course, if you don’t want any of these, just tell me, but if you do… YOU BETTER PARTICIPATE, and SPREAD THE WORD so that you can actually bet with people you actually know!!
Observe: THE FINAL BRACKET of the Tourney, which contains all the MATCHES for ANIBLOG TOURNING!!!!
Observe: THIS ORIGINAL POST, which contains all the RULES for ANIBLOG BETTING!!!
Observe: A LIST OF PARTICIPANTS, which contains all the PARTICIPANTS for ANIBLOG BETTING!!
Observe: Oh right, I have to write that list! Here it is (ordered REVERSE-ALPHABETICALLY because we’re hipster like that):
The Aniblog Tourney.
Surely you have all heard about it.
Guess what we’re going to do?
We’re going to bet.
We’re going to bet on the Aniblog Tourney. Yes, we’re going to be Staking Chances on a Competition of Senseless Animation Vituperations, Organized by a Naïvely Egotistical Writer. And that’s me. I’ll organize this SCCSAV:O-NEW. All you guys have to do is bet.
Always bet on JP (Hinano)»
Hey, everybody. It’s time for me to INTERACT MORE WITH MY REGULAR READERS by starting a
WEEKLY I mean MONTHLY I mean YEARLY competition to see who is the GREATEST FAN OF O-NEW OUT THERE!!
What’s the challenge? Well, the challenge is understanding what I said in these comments. Whoever comments below with the proper translation of my speech, good reasons for thinking that that is the proper translation of my speech, and an excuse for me for saying ‘speech’ when I’m not even talking first will win! Here are example submissions:
Posted 2012/02/30 at 26:71 | Permalink | Reply
‘Wine, art upon sting a genome? So I’m a shoe, tapes a shinto.’ means ‘I sting genomes because I type like shinn87!’
‘Thous, our whiz-wards yew halved. Their butt-eye Kant-creek ate scream; shoots yews. Sing empathy, bee! Cousin thee en-ditch – to mush Worch!’ means ‘I take screenshots because I’m a butt-eye!’
I believe that this is the proper translation of your speech because you are an idiot, I hate you, and you are most definitely also a butt-eye.
An excuse for you saying ‘speech’ when you’re not even talking is because you are a butt-eye and butt-eyes cannot talk, but want to sound like they’re talking.
Posted 2012/12/23 at 23:59 | Permalink | Reply
where are the tits
Posted 2012/03/00 at 00:00 | Permalink | Reply
your wine and shinto comment mens kyaa~ squee~ Ouma Shu is super hot desu~~~~~<3
your wizards and buteye coment means uguuuu~~ my cousin is super cute desu~~
i believ this is right because ouma shu is supper hot desu~~ and my cousin is also super choo-kawai~
you say spech when your not even talking because you are uugly and grosse and déspicable et méprisable. Aller mourir dans un puits au large de la côte de la Finlande. b-b-baka
Posted 1949/10/01 at 07:15 | Permalink | Reply
So do all Mushyrulez need to wear 斗笠 when they write bad posts?
Je ne grosse pas»