Ben-To 1 [Impressions]

So, why the heck am I blogging this? IT’S TIME TO DERP ALL THE WAY IN PREPARATION OF NANOWRIMO

EXPECT 100-WORD POSTS EVERY DAY IN NOVEMBER

BLOGGING BEN-TO, HORIZON, AND MAJIKOI LIKE A BOSS

This is me after this season is over (by which time I will undoubtedly not remember what the heck I decided to do and why the heck I did it):

Satou You is this main character. He’s so lame and lame and lame and lame that his name is lame and his fame is lame and his frames are game because of flame that aimed his claim when he came to maim in shame but don’t blame him, he renamed his dame to reclaim his defame post-game what a lame lame name this guy’s not a dame a lame lame name is the name of this game

He’s beat up like a beet, must’ve not seen Angel Beats because of the heat he got from sweet Pete’s tweet that said ‘he cheats on meat’ and isn’t 1337 enough to meet the receipt offbeat, so eat, he tries to eat his meat but he CAN’T because HE HAS NO MONEEY-t

Then there’s Oshiroi Hana, all she does is say ‘ah ah!!’, must be because she’s bourgeois, what kind of name is Oshiroi, it makes some sense because she annoys, but you don’t want to go destroy the dorm by microwaving a Soyjoy because that’s what the main character does what an idiot who microwaves Soyjoys what’s a Soyjoy anyways

Note to future self: / Do not microwave Soyjoy / Causes time travel

And this guy’s called Uchimoto, he has some pretty fat toes because he’s a fat guy, and he’s old, tries to run but just runs slow, you might think he’s important though, he doesn’t do anything but show, the main character his yo-yos, he doesn’t even actually show the main character his yo-yos

who is he

what a creeper

Satou You goes to Karasuda high school, a place where everyone’s cool, except this guy called Satou You, because he’s an otamot-o. You’d think it’d have a high pool, cause it’s a private school, but it doesn’t even give you food, it assumes and then concludes that everybody isn’t crude, but that’s actually quite quite rude because you pay to go to school so why don’t they GIVE YOU FOOD THESE PEOPLE ARE MONSTERS

As the school doesn’t give him food I GIVE UP OK

He goes to some supermarket, gets beat up, forgets about it the next day, goes to the supermarket again, gets beat up, remembers what happened last day, goes to the supermarket again, and gets beat up again. Oh Japanese supermarkets

The OP makes this seem like some sort of lame harem show about some lame otamot who’s physically weak but EMOTIONALLY STRONG and helps physically strong but EMOTIONALLY WEAK girls become emotionally stronger because Japanese men are too weak to do anything else. Don’t let the OP fool you, because it’s actually a lame harem show about some lame otamot who’s physically weak but EMOTIONALLY STRONG and/or retarded and helps physically strong but EMOTIONALLY WEAK and/or retarded girls lose their virginity. Although I was going to derp this up a bit more, the first episode was actually decent, apart from gg’s horrible encoding, hugeass filesize, and laggy-as-hell everything. Also, the 3D animation was so horrible – I mean, who puts 3D animation on OPs?! That’s like, the stupidest thing to do. OPs should tell us why we /should/ watch your show, not why we /shouldn’t/ watch it.

These types of shows are really pretty sexist, as is the entire tsundere trope – as you want to please female viewers, they create physically strong girls who /still/ need male support, as that’s how you please male viewers. You hardly have any girls who stand on their own – I’d even argue that there isn’t a non-main character girl in a shounen show that stands on their own. Even in Yumekui Merry, that stupid transfer student who was so COOL and STRONG and shit just broke down at the end. Perhaps that ‘even’ was unnecessary.

The methods of introduction are so weird – if some girl came up to me like Hana did to You (man I am going to make so many puns with this name), I’d run the heck away because dude, that’s creepy. You is such an otamot in that he doesn’t even have any defining characteristics. Perhaps the author did this as a ‘hey, your main characters may be unique in their ability to cook/garden/sew/whatever, but they still have no presonality, so I’m going to make a main character that sucks at everything’, which would work if the main character had more personality. The thing is, he has none. He’s good at imitating voices though, which I reckon is going to become a major plot point later on.

Evil Terrorist Subordinate: “Mwahahaha, we have the entire country of Japan on our control. Just pressing this button will make the whole country EXPLODE!”
Scared Harem Girls: “Oh no You, what do we do?! We can’t do anything because we’re scared harem girls!”
You: “Don’t worry, I have a plan. You, go take that Evil Terrorist Boss’s phone with your super physical abilities.”
Scared Harem Girl 1: “But you’re You.”
You: “Scared Harem Girl 1, go take that Evil Terrorist Boss’s phone with your super physical abilities.”
Scared Harem Girl 1: *musters courage through motivational speech by You and becomes COURAGEOUS Harem Girl 1, defeating Evil Terrorist Boss*
Evil Terrorist Boss: “You may have beaten me-”
COURAGEOUS Harem Girl 1: “Actually, I beat you, You did nothing at all.”
Evil Terrorist Boss: “COURAGEOUS Harem Girl 1 may have beaten me, but Evil Terrorist Subordinate only takes orders from me! Now, Japan will EXPLODE! Mwahahaha!”
You: *picks up Evil Terrorist Boss’s phone, calls Evil Terrorist Subordinate*
Evil Terrorist Boss: “What are you going to do?! I talk with a Canadian accent, there’s no way you can impersonate me.”
You: “Hello, eh, you should-”
COURAGEOUS Harem Girl 1: “But you’re You.”
You: “Hello, eh, Evil Terrorist Subordinate should, eh, disarm all of the boumbs, eh, because we’re gouing back to Canada, eh.”
Evil Terrorist Subordinate: “Evil Terrorist Boss, are you sure?”
You: “Yes, now let’s go, eh.”
Evil Terrorist Subordinate: “Alright, I disarmed all of the bombs and now there’s no way to explode them ever again.”
Evil Terrorist Boss: “NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!”

tl;dr: this is proper use of source music, eat lots of fish fish fish, it’s good for your body body bodoesn’t rhyme

P.S. Watching this with dad sawing wood in the background helps me wash the horrible tribal music out of my ears
P.P.S. Maybe this is just a stealth parody of ridiculous masculine shows and ridiculous masculine protagonists who don’t actually do anything. Rock doesn’t actually do anything. He doesn’t rock at all.

Oh, here’s a cover rating. Ben-To’s first episode really wasn’t half-bad. That monk guy is cool. You isn’t. You aren’t either. AHAHHAHAHAAHHAHA THAT’S SO FUNNY

Cover Rating: 4/10 (Good) – Blogging